Tell Me How
by lolabloodlust
Summary: Sora goes to camp and finds out not only that he's gay but that he is in love with Riku, his brother Roxas bestfriend. lol crappy summary, sorry, it gets better that this, really. Sora/Riku and a little Axel/Roxas
1. Introductions

**My first fan fiction! I really hope you like it...**

**So... I'm not going to submit more chapter unless I get at least one review.**

** I don't want to work my ass off if no one reads it! So PLEASE if you liked it... review! Tell me you want more and I'll happily will give you more.**

**And please forgive me if I have some mistakes, English is not my first languageand i suck at it a little.  
**

**Lol, I wanna thanks my friend Axel! She help me a lot and is still helping me and will continue helping me with the spelling and grammar and giving me some advice. So Axel, I love you! Thanks!!**

**Anyway hope you like it.**

**Yeah, if I owned the characters I wouldn't be writing a fan fiction, right?**

...

**Tell Me How**

Chapter One

Introductions

"Sora! Sora wake up!!"

_"Mmngh…_ two more minutes..."

Roxas rolled his eyes at his little brother and pulled the sheets off of Sora, "C'mon Sora... Riku is waiting in the car."

"Fuck Riku…" Sora muttered, burrowing his head into the pillow.

Roxas laughed and murmured something that sounded like "I know you want to…" At this, Sora jumped out of bed and looked strait in to his brother's eyes, blue eyes just like his, but for some reason Roxas eyes were darker, deeper, different from Sora's that always shone with happiness even if there wasn't anything to be happy about.

"What did you just say!?" He asked him challenging to say it again.

With a smirk on his face Roxas looked at his brother amused. He knew that would get him out of bed, he was so predictable, at least to him, he knew him so well, "I say you're gonna be late" he singsonged.

Sora didn't move, he just stared at the blond, he had heard what Roxas said.

That he wanted to fuck Riku? Oh haha, funny. He hated Riku! He was always making fun of him and pissing him off. He didn't want anything to do with him, but he was his brother's best friend so he was always around, plus he was giving him a ride to his camp…shit! The art camp! He was running late! Sora suddenly started moving, getting his things, putting some clean clothes on. No time for a shower! He hadn't realized Roxas had left the room while he was lost in thought.

Five minutes later Sora was ready to go, panting in his doorway, Riku and Roxas were already in the car, laughing. Probably at me, Sora thought.

Despite that Sora got in Riku's expensive new car (a gift from mommy and daddy) and they went on their way.

It was an hour drive from Sora's place to the bus station and Roxas slept all the way there.

"So… what's this camp about anyway?" asked Riku.

Sora was looking outside, either he didn't hear him or he didn't want to answer, Riku tried again:

"Sora?" He asked looking through the rear-view mirror. Sora looked up, blue eyes meeting aquamarine.

There's was something about Riku's eyes and the way he said his name that made Sora's stomach feel funny. He had felt that before and it was always around Riku but he always pushed those weird feelings away.

It's Riku we are talking about here. And I hate Riku! he always thought in distress.

"Art camp." He finally answered still not looking at him.

"Oh! How interesting…" Riku said pouring sarcasm through every word. "And what kind of art are you interested in?"

"Theater." Sora responded so low the silver-hair teen barely heard him; he had always like theater. It was fun. He was very outgoing and he liked to make people laugh with his shenanigans; it's not like he wanted to do this for a living, he still didn't know what he really wanted to do, but he didn't worry too much about it, he still had a whole year to figure it out, no, two years.

The art camp was something that he wanted to do out of fun and curiosity, he had never camped before and he really wanted to do something different this holiday. He always got bored on holidays! All his friends; Wakka, Tidus, Selphie, and his other classmates, went away for school break and his brother always hung-out with Riku, so this year he asked his parents if he could go to camp and they had agreed to it saying Sora had been a really good boy keeping his grades up, (with much help from his brother) and keeping his room tidy. His parents never had a lot of expectations from their sons; they just loved them the way they were.

Sora was really exited about it; he had read and heard a lot of things about "Xenmas Art Camp."

It had six different teachers and six different houses dedicated to each different art. There was a house for Theater, Paint, Literature, Music, Sculpture, and Architecture, but they all ate in the same place and shared the same bathrooms. Sora had seen photos of the place and it was enormous! He just knew he was going to have a great time there.

As he was looking through the window, thinking, a sly smile appeared on his face and he heard Riku laughing.

"What!?" He yelled. It was too damn early in the morning for Riku to start his usual, 'make Sora miserable' hobby. Riku had laughed because he though Sora looked cute with that stupid smile on his face, but he didn't say that… Instead he said: "Oh nothing… that's very… manly...theater."

"…." Sora just ignored him.

"So…" Riku insisted "you sure you'll be able to climb to the stage?"

"And what's that supposed to mean?" Sora asked throwing daggers with his eyes into the rear-view mirror.

"Oh, just that you are short…" Riku answered smirking.

At this Sora moved from his seat beside the window to the middle of the backseat and kicked the back of Riku's seat causing Riku to turn his smirk into a laugh.

"Roxas is only a year older than me and I'm as tall as he is! And you never bother him about his high!" Sora try to defend himself, or more like tried to get Riku to stop or at least explain why he bothered him so much about every little detail.

"I'm just messing around with you, man." He said still laughing.

"Yeah I know, you always do and I hate it."

They had reach a stop so Riku took this chance to turn around to look at Sora, who was wearing the most adorable pout Riku had ever seen in his life. He couldn't stop himself from thinking just how cute Sora looked right then.

"I didn't know it bothered you so much," he said in a serious tone… "I should do it more often then" he finished getting back to the driving. That won him another kick at his back.

The rest of the trip was just the same. Riku just kept pissing Sora off; there were too many things to make fun of about theater and art camp itself. Sora tried to ignore the comments, but for some reason what Riku said mattered to Sora, that was one of the many things that bothered him so much about Riku, he felt so weird around him, and the more he thought about it the less he understood his feelings toward the silver haired, very handsome and tall teen, if he didn't know better he would think he liked Riku.

Not just as a friend but REALLY like, Riku.

But that wasn't possible, not because he had a problem with being gay, he couldn't care less about that. He actually had his suspicions but he wasn't sure yet and honestly wasn't eager to find out, what mattered was that he knew his family and friends would accept him either way and as for the rest of the world, he could handle them, no problem, he was a brave boy. When the time comes, he thought, when I fall in love with someone, boy or girl I'll deal with it then. No, he didn't have a problem with that; he had a problem with Riku.


	2. The Art Camp

**Okay first of all, thanks to Axel again for her help!**

**Second... I'm sorry it took so long!**

**I swear i'll make it up to you guys! Next chapter will have sex violence drugs alcohol and Kairi's death, no just kidding. Or maybe i'm not! You'll have to review to find out! : D  
**

**Third... thanks so much for the reviews and faves and everything!! I'm so happy!! **

**I hope I don't disappointing you guys!**

**Well hope you like this next chapter and please forgive my bad english.**

...

**Tell Me How**

Chapter Two

The Art Camp

When they arrived at the station Riku woke up Roxas by shaking him lightly, "Roxas were here" he whisper kindly to him.

It was amazing how sweet Riku could be when he wanted to. Sora thought that, of all the things that bothered him about Riku this was the worst. Why couldn't he be like that with him?!

He used to think Riku was in love with Roxas, or that he liked him because he had always been sweet and kind to him. He thought that Riku was a bitch to everyone except his brother, but then he met Namine, Roxas and Riku's beautiful petite blond friend and Riku was nice to her too, and then when he saw Riku at school on breaks with his classmates smiling and laughing, Sora realized, much to his dislike, that Riku was a nice guy to everyone except him.

'What's his fucking problem?' he thought frowning. He had been standing in front of the trunk with his hand ready to open it and he had stayed frozen like that, thinking. He always did that, he always got lost in his thoughts stopping whatever he was doing before.

Sora jumped when he felt a hand on his head and Riku's voice coming from behind him, his breath tickling in his hear.

"There's smoke coming from your head, don't think so hard." Sora took Riku's hand away and faced him.

"Fuck off Riku" he said coldly. There wasn't any need to be so rude but Sora's recent train of thought had made him feel mad, no, not mad, hurt for the way Riku treated him all the time.

"Sora, be nice" Roxas said, pushing Sora out off the way to open the trunk and get Sora's stuff out, "C'mon you are going to miss the buss dumdum!" he said handing him his bag and smiling, "let's go."

Sora couldn't help but smile back at his brother. "Yeah, let's go," he said taking the bag Roxas offered him. He was pissed at the fact that Roxas always thought he was the one being a jackass when all the time it had always been Riku, but he couldn't help feel exited about finally leaving the town, even if it was for just a month.

"Hey Riku, you coming or what?" Roxas asked as they started walking towards the bus.

Riku shrugged and said, "Naa, I'll wait in the car," then he looked at Sora and added "You know, it's really okay if you don't come back." He got on the car and slammed the door.

Sora looked at his brother lifting an eyebrow; his face clearly said 'see!?' Roxas laughed and put an arm around his little brother's shoulders and started to walk toward the bus again, not paying attention to his best friend's comment, he knew he didn't really mean it.

When Sora got inside the bus he looked for a place to sit, there was an empty space at the back and he put his bag on the seat asking the boy sitting beside the window if the seat was taken, the teen didn't answer but Sora put the bag there anyway and went outside to say goodbye to his brother.

"So" Roxas said messing Sora's chocolate brown hair "I'm gonna miss you."

"Oh please," Sora said smiling and putting emphasis on the "pl", "You are so happy I'm going you could pee on your pants right know."

They both laughed and gave each other a one-arm hug and then Sora got on the bus one last time. He went through the small aisle and sat down. He looked at the window and smiled, Roxas was standing outside the window, and he waved at him and then turned and got in Riku's car. The brunet got as much comfortable as you could get on a cheap regular bus just as the bus driver got inside.

"Are you all ready to go?" The driver asked bored. He got a few shy "yes" in respond and continued "Okay... My name is Xaldin I'm your awesome bus driver and I'll be taking you to Xenmas Art camp. Now, you'll be stuck here with me for the next 5 hours so if you don't want to be kicked out of my bus in the middle of nowhere you'll behave, okay?" He finished getting behind the wheel and starting the engine with out waiting for a response.

"Nice guy" Sora murmured to himself, then he changed his attention to the boy, well not boy actually he looked at least two years older than him, sitting next to him by the window.

The guy had long bright red hair and a triangular tattoo under each eye and although he was sitting he could tell the teen was very tall. Sora could only come up with one word to describe the teen: cool.

"Hi," he said turning to look at him. No answer. "Uhm… Hi! I'm Sora!" He said louder, maybe the guy was a little deaf.

"Hi Sora, my name is Kairi, nice to meet you!" A girl, that was sitting in front of Sora had turned around on her seat to look at him and was now offering him her hand along with a sweet smile.

"Uh," he said intelligently, shaking the girl's hand and smiling too, "Hi Kairi."

They stayed silent for a few seconds before Kairi spoke again. "Oh, don't mind Axel, he's always an asshole when he's just woken up." Sora looked at the girl, first surprised to hear the word "asshole" coming from her pink tiny lips and then confused,

"Who's Axel?" He asked her leaning his head to the side.

"The guy with no manners!" She said pointing indiscreetly at the red-haired teen.

"I heard that Kairi!" Axel said, finally taking his eyes of the window. Kairi laughed and said, "Good, now apologize to Sora!" And she pointed at Sora making him push himself into the seat.

Axel looked bewildered. "What?!" He said, "And why exactly should I listen to you, you are not my mother Kairi, not even if you do have her big old ugly butt!"

Sora had to put a hand on his mouth to stop the laugh that was threatening to erupt when Kairi's jaw dropped open and stayed that way for a few seconds then she turned her head and looked down, obviously looking at her ass before turning again to face Axel to say something to him but was stopped by the teen's laughter.

"You are so bad at comebacks! Anyone would think that after years of knowing me you would have learned something!" Axel said.

"You are an asshole." She said smiling and giving him the finger.

"And you love this asshole!" Axel responded cupping her cheek before turning to look at the window again taking an I-pod out of his pocket and putting on his earphones.

Kairi sighed and turned to Sora. "So... Sora what house are you in?"

"Marluxia's house."

"Really? Me too! So you like theater, eh?"

"Well... I'm not crazy about it; I'm just here to have a good time…"

Sora and Kairi talked all the way to the camp, he really liked the girl, she was funny and sweet and easy to talk to, they became friends right away.

When they arrived at the camp Xaldin told them they had to go to the dining room for the welcoming reunion; there, they would be introduced to their teachers, headmaster and other authorities... Sora got in the line to enter the dining room behind the tall teen from the bus, Axel.

"You!" Sora heard a man talking angrily at Axel.

"Well hello Saix! Nice to see you too, miss me?!" The man growled, much like a dog would have and told Axel to "get his punk ass inside"

After Axel got in, Sora gave the man in the door a shy "Hi." He was kinda scary, he was tall and well built, with long blue hair and a scar with the shape of an X on his face, Sora though that Axel had to be really brave, or really stupid, to talk to that man like he had.

"Hi, my name is Saix, I'm the head of security and the second in charge, please tell me your name and house." The man named Saix recited bored.

Sora complied, and Saix told him to sit on a table near the end of the room where a pink-haired man was sitting with a bunch of other campers. He took a seat beside Kairi and noticed that Axel was in the same table talking cheerfully with the man with pink hair.

As soon as Sora sat down the man stood up and started talking to all of his students.

"Hi" He said smiling, "My name is Marluxia, not Marly, not Mar, not pinky but Marluxia. I'm the head of the theater house and I'll be your teacher for the next four weeks."

"Now," he took a deep breath and pointed to the table on the middle of the room, it was taller and smaller than the other six tables, it had room for nine people when the other ones had at least twenty seats each and a man was seating in the tallest chair looking around the room. "That's the big table, yeah, I know, lame name," he said, smiling at the sound of chuckling. "The man sitting there is your headmaster Mr. Xenmas-"

Axel pretended to cough and said "Mansex" and the whole table started laughing. Marluxia hit Axel softly in the head and continued with a little smile on his face, it was obvious he wanted to laugh too but didn't think it would be appropriate.

"-Ehem, I'm going to sit in that table with the rest of my colleagues and you are going to stay quiet and behave during Xenmas speech, okay?" He asked, some of them said "Okay Mr. Marluxia" others just nodded.

"Axel…" Marluxia said looking at him when the teen didn't answer.

"Yeah, yeah I'll behave." Axel said shaking his hand in the man's face.

Marluxia went to sit at the 'Big Table' and so did the other 5 men that where sitting at the other tables. When everyone was sat, Xenmas stood up and started talking; his voice was deep and soothing and Sora had to try really hard not to fall asleep.

"Welcome," He said opening his arms wide as if to embrace them all, "to my art camp. For the next four weeks we will be living together, learning and hopefully having a good time, creating memories...

There are, as you all know 6 houses, one for each art. Theater," he said looking at Marluxia who stood up nodded and sat again.

"Painting," A woman with blond short hair stood up this time, there where a few whistles and Sora heard a boy at his table saying "I would tap that."

"Literature," Xenmas continued and a man with violet hair that fell down on one side of his face stood up, he was really short; at first Sora though he hadn't stood at all.

"Music," A blond man with a lock bear stood up making a peace and love sing, he had a lot of earrings in his ears and one on his nose, Sora couldn't help thinking that he was really good looking.

"Sculpture," A really tall and big man stood up, brown hair combed back; Sora though he look like a sculpture himself, one made by hand on a hard stone.

"And finally, last but certainly not least, Architecture." And a man with long blond hair and big green eyes stood up, looked around the room bored and sat down so Xenmas could finish.

"Your houses will be used for sleep and storage only and only the people from that house can enter. Each house has two large bedrooms one for boys and one for girls. The dining room and the bathrooms will be shared by all the houses"

He took a second to breathe and think about what was missing, "Sitting here to my right is Saix, he is the head of security and second in charge and if I were you, I wouldn't mess with him." He said smiling to the man standing by his side.

"To my left we have Xaldin, some of you have already met him because he had to drive one of the buses today, but he's our cook and he'll be feeding you the most delicious meals for the next month" Xaldin smiled to himself as he sat down and Xenmas concluded his speech, "If you have any question please don't ask me. Ask your teachers. And now let's all enjoy our meals so we can all go to bed."

All the teachers seemed pretty interesting in Sora's opinion; they were all so different from anyone he had ever known or see. The headmaster, he thought, was the weirdest of all, or maybe his teacher, Marluxia, they all seemed pretty weird actually.

The food was served seconds later and the brunet ate fast and much until he couldn't breathe and talked to his fellow campers to get to know them, they were all nice people; and later, when he walked to his house along with the other boys in his table he knew he was going to have a great time.

...

**The camp reminded me A LOT of Hogwarts...lol, but I didn't do it on purpose! I have no idea how a camp is supposed to work so I just followed my imagination (that is apparently contaminated with Harry Potter)**


	3. Axel

**OMG OMFG i'm SOOOOO sorry it took so long!!**

**I was having problems writing it down and then my lovely beta got sick and blah blah blah excuses, I know... but it's here! And it's really long!! Yay! As in compensation for the wait...**

**Okay I won't hold you...**

**Tell Me How**

Chapter Three

Axel

Sora was lying on his bed, watching the clock that hanged above the boy's room door; illuminated only by the moonlight, it was laughing at Sora telling him it was 4 : 32 in the morning. He sighed and sat on his bed, hugging his knees to his chest, and giving up trying to sleep at all.

Tomorrow was his last day at camp.

He had to perform in front of the whole camp for the Farewell Party, but that wasn't the reason he couldn't sleep, he wasn't nervous about the play, in fact, he was exited about it.

The reason he couldn't sleep was because he didn't want to go home. He had had such a good time here; he had made many friends, learned lots of stuffs and laughed his ass off many times.

The meals at the dinning room had always been so bountiful, fun and delicious; Xaldin really knew what he was doing. Axel, always made everyone laugh with his silly jokes; one of Sora's favorites was when he called 'Marly' at Marluxia.

Sora smiled in the dark at the memory of Marluxia's face when he was called like that, he would get really red, the same shade of red that Vexen, the architecture teacher, would get every time Marluxia talked to him.

Marluxia was such a great teacher and a really nice person, though, just like Saix, it was wiser to stay on his good side; and Sora had grown very fond of him.

Sora had also gotten to know a little about the other teachers at the camp while talking to Marluxia. From what he had said, and what Sora had been able to see, he knew that they where all excellent teachers and that they were all respected members of the Art community, they were, as Xenmas had referred to them once, the best of each art.

Vexen was very intelligent and hard worker, he had struggled a lot to get where he was now and apparently he was a really good dancer, according to Marluxia. However he was really shy and he had the strange hobby of conducting experiments that tended to blow up.

Zexion, the literature teacher, was an incredibly wise and logical human. He was always reading, he spend all his free time with his nose buried in different kinds of books, and he loved teaching and sharing his knowledge. Marluxia said that Zexion was like a human encyclopedia.

Lexaeus, the sculpture teacher, was like a giant teddy bear, he was sweet, paternal and a little overprotective with everyone he knew, especially with Zexion, though Marluxia didn't know why. He was really quiet and didn't spoke unless he was spoken to, but when he did his words were kind and meaningful.

Luxord, the music teacher, was the newest member of the staff, Marluxia had told Sora that the only thing he need it to know about him was that he should never play cards with him. Sora could tell that he was British because of his accent, one that Sora found very appealing, and that he had a smile so bright that would make the sun want to commit suicide.

And Larxene, the painting teacher, was an incredible artist, her paintings always managed to make your jaw drop flat on the floor. She had an unnaturally high self-esteem and she always got what she wanted, no matter the price. Marluxia said that they had been best friends ever since middle school and that he never got bored of her 'electric' personality.

Over the last month the theater house had read many plays in order to choose one to perform at the Farewell Party. They had had tryouts to choose the different actors for each role. Sora had nailed one of the main ones along with Kairi and Axel, he was really proud of himself, he never thought his mates were going to actually choose him, and he was really happy about it.

They had practiced the play countless times and he was pretty confident that everything was going to turn out great.

When the brunet started replaying the story in his head to make sure he wasn't going to forget anything tomorrow, he got distracted by Axel; that slept in the bed next to his, who had started mumbling in his sleep.

"Not my hair mom…" The red head said shifting his position in the bed; Sora had to cover his mouth to make the sound of his laughter somewhat lower. He looked at Axel while he kept turning in bed murmuring things like "Demyx! Give me my squirt gun dammit!" or "burn baby!"

Sora smiled at his sleeping friend, wondering what was he dreaming about. He never thought, not for one second, Axel was going to become his friend when he first met him. The teen was two years older than Sora but they got along just perfectly. He was a really good friend, he always knew when something was wrong so he tried to cheer you up and he always did, making silly jokes or just saying what he thought you wanted to hear, he was really optimistic and he never walked out on people.

Although he pretended to be a tough guy he was really sweet and he cared a lot for his friends.

Of all the people Sora met at that camp and of all the friends he made, he cared for Axel the most. There was just something about him that made Sora happy and now he just couldn't imagine his life without him.

No, he didn't want the camp to end. Of course he missed his family and his friends, he missed his brother the most, he even missed Riku's annoying cocky smile...

Riku.

Sora sighed deeply, there was another reason why he didn't want the camp to end and that reason was him. Not being with Riku gave Sora a lot of time to think about him, if that was even possible, but the funny thing was that Sora was thinking about him in a different kind of way from what he used to.

He missed him, he missed seeing his eyes and the way his silver hair fell over them, he missed his voice, even if that voice was mocking him most of the time, he missed having him near and touch him, even if the only reason he did was to punch him or push him away, Sora didn't understand why on earth he would miss him.

"I thought I hated him…" he whispered to himself, bringing his knees closer to his chest, "But now I think... I might actually lov- no, that not possible, no way"

It was strange but somehow it made sense, there were so many things he didn't like about Riku but they all were related to the fact that Riku didn't like him, so, if he was in love with him it was logical for him to hate the way Riku treated him because, deep in side he wanted Riku to like him.

And the fact that he didn't have any idea why Riku seemed to hate him so much was really annoying.

Well I am attracted to him, that's for sure... he thought shivering. Some nights back, he had a wet dream about him. Sora blushed and reminisced. It was actually pretty romantic at first; in his dream Riku had cornered him in an alley and had confessed a dying love for him and kissed him, but then things got really hot and… well by the time he had woken up his sheets were sticky and the worst part was that he had woken Axel with the moans and other sounds that had come out from his mouth while he was dreaming...

"Ahh... Riku!" Sora woke up sweating and all sticky. He sat on his bed, scenes of his dream turning around in his head; he absently ran a hand through his hair.

"Why hello there…" Said an amused voice to his right, making him jump, Axel was propped up on an elbow looking at Sora through the dark with a grin on his face, "Something wrong?" Axel asked, suppressing a giggle.

"He-Hey, uhmm I... bad dream..." he said shrugging nervously.

Axel laughed and said "Well, that really didn't sound like a bad dream to me and I don't know about you, but that…" Axel pointed at Sora's crotch, "usually happens to me when I have a _WET_ dream, not a bad one!"

Sora looked at where Axel had pointed and turned red in an instant.

Oh shit! The shorter of them thought as he grabbed his pillow and quickly tried to cover his arousal with it. He looked at the pillow then at Axel then at the pillow again and blinked.

"I… I, uhh...bathroom..." he said, grabbing his sheets to cover himself, and heading to the door.

Halfway there Axel called to him, "Hey Sora, who's Riku?!" Sora stopped walking, turned, gave Axel the finger before continued his way to the bathroom hearing Axel's maniacal laughter all the way there.

…

He was scared because he had no idea how he was going to act in front of Riku when he got back home, not because he thought Riku would notice anything different, he was so occupied being mister perfect he wouldn't even notice a smoking pink horse dancing in front of him, Sora's brows lifted at his own occurrences.

Maybe Roxas would notice something different but he didn't care, he was probably going to talk with Roxas about this when he got home, or maybe not, maybe…ten years from now. He always talked to his big brother about everything, they had no secrets and they always help each other, but Roxas had always said Sora had a "thing" for Riku to annoy him, and Sora really didn't want his brother to know he was right.

I'll tell him ten years from now. He thought, the vision of Roxas' "I told you so!" face coming back to him.

Axel laughed in his dreams and kicked a few times making Sora smile at him again, he looked at the clock, this time enlightened by the first rays of sun.

6 o'clock. Sora rolled his hypnotizing blue eyes.

That asshole manages to ruin things for me even when he's not here, the brunet thought, blaming a not so innocent Riku for his lack of sleep.

'It's going to fucking hurt waking up tomorrow.'

He punched his pillow lightly to make it more comfortable and fell asleep the second his head touched it.

…

The next day Sora woke up at the sound of the mega-phoned singing voice of Xenmas:

"Good morning sunshine! The earth says hello!"

Xenmas had really funny ways of waking up the students… singing or yelling things that didn't make complete sense, like the time he yelled 'Surprise parents visit!!'

That particular phrase made Axel leap from the bed.

Sora woke up, but he didn't get up. Next to him, Axel was slowly stretching himself, his sheets rolled to the floor and he made his usual waking up process that consisted in curling his toes and yawning loudly once or twice, then he sat on the bed and rubbed his eyes with the back of his big hands.

Around him, his room mates were all getting dressed quickly and leaving, but Sora still hadn't gathered up the courage to get out of bed, he hid under the covers whining and felt someone sitting besides him on his bed, opening only one eye he saw a smiling Axel looking at him, head leaning on his own shoulder.

Sora opened his other eye and mumbled a "Morning" pouting.

Axel chuckled, "You stayed up killing brain cells until dawn last night again didn't you?" He asked poking at Sora's round nose, "C'mon, get up, get dressed, and go to the dining room. I'll make sure you survive the morning and you can take a nap after the picnic okay?"

"But I'm gonna miss the architecture exhibition!" Sora complained leaning on his elbows.

"And probably the literature crap too, but you don't want to fall asleep in the middle of the play or miss the bonfire, right?" Axel pointed, heading to the door, "Hurry up." he added and left.

He certainly did not want to fall asleep in the middle of the play and the bonfire was part of the music presentation… Axel knew how much Sora liked listening to professor Luxord…

…

Half an hour later Sora was sitting with Axel and Kairi in the 'Farewell Pick-nick' eating lazily.

After breakfast all of the students went to the small work shop near the pool where all the works and paintings from the paint house were being exposed.

Larxene said a few words complementing her students and her teaching; Sora tried really hard to listen to what she was saying but the words just entered one ear and went out through the other one.

She had made her students choose one of their own works and then she made them explain it in front of the camp. Sora leaned his head in Kairi's shoulder and pretended to listen, then, with his head still in her shoulder they walked through the room looking at the paintings.

Most of them were really good, one or two Sora thought he could have done better and one of them he fell in love with; it showed two human shadows, one of the shadows was looking at the a taller one and even though you couldn't see his face you could tell he was looking at him with a needy loving look and the other one was looking down at their holding hands.

The background showed pieces of a puzzle that put together looked like the sight of a sunset at a beach. It was called 'Forbidden Love'.

The title made Sora feel slightly ill.

Well, it was either that or his lack of sleep.

…

After the painting exhibition, they went to a large open space near the forest; which was off limits, that they usually used to play football, but now it was full of sculptures of different sizes and forms, while some of them were abstracts others were extremely detailed figures.

Lexaeus didn't make any elaborate speech like Larxene in fact he just stood there and motioned to the sculptures with one of his strong arms.

Axel and Sora made a quick run through the entire place barely paying attention to the exposed works and then they sat on the grass sun bathing waiting for Kairi, that took precious time examine each one of the sculptures.

"So, what was it now?" Axel asked Sora, his eyes closed enjoying the feeling of the sun in his face; they were resting against each others back with their heads leaning on the other's shoulder.

"What was what now?" Sora asked already knowing the answer…

"Don't play stupid with me Sora, what kept you up last night?" Sora opened his eyes but shot them closed immediately after he sighed heavily.

"I was…um… rehearsing the play".

The red head moved to look at Sora in the face making him fall on his back but before he could stand up Axel was leaning over him looking at him in the eye.

"Bullshit." he said serious, then he smiled and said "Were you thinking about someone...special?"

Sora pushed Axel away and sat down, "I wasn't thinking about Riku!" he turned red at the instant biting his tongue when he realized he had just slip up.

"I never said you were…" Axel said after his laugh had died, he had an expression on his face that clearly yelled 'victory', the redhead was obviously waiting for Sora to do slip up.

He punched Sora friendly in the arm encouraging him to tell him what was wrong; Sora got the message and gave him a faint smile before sharing…

"I was thinking about the camp, I was thinking that… I'm not sure I want to go home yet."

"Why? You said you missed your brother, I thought you wanted to get out of here…"

"Roxas? Yeah I miss him. A lot. But I just… there's something that I need to figure out before I go home but even if I do…what am I going to do about it? I mean… it's fucked up…"

Axel chuckled "What's fucked up? What are you talking about Sora?"

Sora looked at him, thinking if he should share or not… after a while he came to the conclution that, yes it was he was safe with Axel, after all they were friends and Axel was gay too and pretty open about it.

He smiled at Axel and blushed then he looked down and up again, opened his mouth to say something and looked down again. His friend was starting to get really impatient but then Sora started talking.

"Axel… I… think I mean I know… no… I think I'm-"

"Hi guys!" it was Marluxia. "Sorry to interrupt but we need to get going, the picnic is about to start."

Sora stood up and extended his hand to Axel "Wait! What were you going to say?" he asked, taking Sora's helping hand and standing up.

"Oh...nothing I'll tell you later." Sora said following Marluxia.

…

"You'll tell me now?"

"Tell you what?" Kairi asked, Sora gave Axel a reproachful look as in saying 'look what you've done now'.

They were sitting in some wooden tables outside the dining room eating sandwiches, all around them their fellow campers were chatting happily and commenting on the sculptures they had just seen.

To their right, Luxord was sitting with a bunch of campers making them laugh their guts out with an imitation of 'Drunk Xaldin'.

When Axel saw Sora's expression he shrugged apologetically and changed the subject, "So... did you see that sculpture that looked like an ass?"

Sora laughed, thanking Axel silently, "Which one?"

"The one with the two balls" He said grabbing two round breads and putting them together on the table. Sora laughed again but stopped right after, his head hurt and he felt dizzy. He really needed to sleep.

"You are an asshole, Axel" Kairi told him with a scowl.

"No, I'm not, that sculpture is" he responded giving Kairi an all-knowing-smile.

This time Kairi was the one who laughed while Sora just gave a faint smile.

An all-knowing-smile, like the one Riku made all the time.

'Stupid Riku thinks he knows everything.'

He was going to see him tomorrow; Roxas had told him Riku had offered to take him to the bus station.

'Stupid Roxas that doesn't have a car…'

"Sora, what's wrong?" Kairi asked him worried, when she noticed he wasn't laughing.

"It's nothing Kai. Axel? Would you come with me-"

"To the end of the world my love!" Axel said cutting him off in middle sentence taking Sora's hand in his own.

"Cute." Sora responded smiling and taking back his hand, continuing as if nothing had happened

"You are better at talking to the teachers than I am. Could you ask Marly if I can go to the rooms to sleep for an hour or two?"

"Sure thing. You go ahead and I'll let them know."

"Kay thanks…" Sora said standing up to leave.

"Wet dreams!"

"Don't you mean _sweet _dreams?" Kairi asked.

…

"Sora!"

Roxas came running and hugged him tightly "Oh man! I have so many things to tell you. You'll never guess what happened. I'm so happy. I missed you so much!" he said without breathing and jumping up and down.

"Uhm... yeah, me too…" It wasn't that he wasn't happy to see his brother but he was just not used to seeing Roxas jumping up and down like a silly school-girl.

"Look Sora!" Roxas said showing him his right hand. A silver ring. A silver engagement ring. "Riku and I are getting married!"

…

"Aaaaahhhhhhh!!"

"Sora?! Are you okay?" Asked a very concerned Kairi.

Sora blinked a few times until Kairi came into focus. "Yeah, what are you doing here?" he asked confused upon seeing Kairi on the boy's dorms.

"Waking you up silly. You have already slept enough." She answered smiling, "Nightmare?"

Sora tided his head to the side confused as he didn't know what Kairi was talking about and then he remembered, he had had a nightmare, he concentrated to remember his dream and chuckled,

"Yeah. And a really stupid one…"

Kairi smiled and sat on Sora's bed, "Aww poor thing" she said caressing Sora's cheek.

'Uhm…what is she doing? Wait. Is she leaning CLOSER? Oh My God…Sora! Say something, anything! Help! Someone...' Sora thought helplessly as Kairi kept getting closer and closer.

"Okay: Sora please tell me you were not the one who just screamed like a little girl?" It was Axel.

Thank god, it was Axel. Sora thought as he looked at his friend.

The red head was leaning against the frame of the door with his arms crossed over his chest, Sora stood up really fast, making Kairi lose balance and fall flat on her face into his pillow, doing as if nothing had ever happen Sora stretched and yawned, "How much did I sleep?"

"Well you missed the architecture expo, but you really didn't miss anything good expect for Vexen's speech!" Axel responded laughing, "Man! You should have seen him: I swear if he had gotten any redder he would have exploded!" He threw Sora a clean shirt for him to put on and sat at the bottom of his bed his mind lost in memory.

Kairi mumbled something about waiting outside and she left with a few short quick steps.

"What's with her?" Axel asked when the door closed behind her.

"Dunno" Sora lied, "What else did I miss?"

"Zexion´s speech... boooring. But if you hurry up." he said smiling when Sora glared at him, "We can still take a look at the short stories and poems."

"Okay let's go!"

…

"You'll tell me now?"

"No Axel! Stop asking or I won't tell you at all!"

They were walking down the edge of the forest eating sea-salt ice-cream, well, at least Axel was, Sora hated sea-salt ice-cream but when Xaldin offered him one he didn't refuse, those things reminded him of Roxas so he took it with out really thinking about it.

His brother loved them so much that he would do _anything_ to get one; he smiled to himself at the memory of his brother, but after then gave the ice-cream one single lick he shivered and gave it to Axel who accepted happily even though he still hadn't finished his.

After Sora's nap and the exposition of the literature house, in which Sora was honestly not interested… well, at least not as much as Axel had been.

This really surprised Sora, finding a new side of his friend's personality. Axel read every single one of the works being exposed in no time and then he read one of the stories again and yet again before Sora and Kairi were even finished.

After Literature they had the rest of the afternoon free to finish packing or just hang around the large camp. Axel and Sora did the packing and Kairi watched, she had already packed everything the night before, and when she got bored she left to hang out with the girls.

By the time they were done it was dinner time which went smoothly, everyone was so busy eating Xaldin's sinful plate and no-one had time to cause trouble. Now all that was left was the play and the bonfire.

"Axel? What was the name of that story you read like five times?" Sora asked him curious when he gave up trying to bite the sea-salt taste off his tongue.

"I'm not sure if it was 'Gold and Silver' or 'Gold or Silver'" he said taking one bite of his ice-cream and one of Sora's.

"Ah… yeah… what was it about?" Sora asked.

Axel looked at him briefly before answering, "You know that girl… Luna, she is a witch and she goes to find her teacher who went to look for the prince…"

"Oh yeah…Didn't know you where into that." He said, then making a quick motion, he took Axel's hat off, a black and white striped hat he used sometimes, although Sora thought he should use it all the time cause it look REALLY good on him, but he felt like messing around and he took it anyway knowing Axel wasn't going to be able to stop him because he had his hands full; spikes of bright red hair fell free of their wool prison down to his shoulders.

"Oi! Give it back!" The red head put both ice-creams in his mouth and took the hat from Sora's hands with a speed that was only equivalent with one of a feline and put it back on, stuffing his hair inside it. "And what exactly am I into?"

"Oh… you are no fun!" Sora said with a pout that immediately vanished replaced with a sly smile, "You know, all that romantic crap"

"It's not crap..." Axel whispered. "You'll tell me now?"

"Axel!" No, Sora wasn't the one who yelled, it was Kairi. "Sora!"

"What!?" Sora yelled back right in Axel ear making him jump and add a scowl to his glare at Sora.

"The play is about to start you assholes, where were you?!" she said not exactly lowering her voice as she approached them, "C'mon lets go!"

She grabbed Sora by the wrist and started running toward the dinning room and Axel followed them walking lazily finishing his ice-creams.

…

The play was called "Trees Die Standing." it was about an illegal organization that helped people to live better, they made a series of events occur around sad, bad, or angry people that made them change for good; they could be really silly things like the sound of a nightingale or big things like the kidnap of a child.

Kairi played the part of a young girl who had been saved by this organization, and now she was part of it. Sora was the leader of the organization and Axel played the part of and old man that needed the help of the organization.

Everything regarding the play went excellent and Marluxia was drove to the edge of tears by the trio's acting.

Axel was strangely nervous at the beginning and a little embarrassed at the end even though he did an excellent job; and Sora thought that was rather cute of him.

Kairi was glowing and Sora was happy everything had gone okay and now he was exited about Luxord's bonfire. Music, fire, Luxord, and beer. What else could he ask for?

'How about an aspirin?'

…

The bonfire was over and so was the beer and Sora was drunk.

He had the weakest alcohol tolerance ever, so he new better than to accept more than two glasses of beer, but he was in a camp and nobody knew him; plus Axel was there to look after him so he thought:

'What the heck?'

Everyone had already gone to bed or was running around the place or, better yet, watching Luxord humiliate the rest of the staff with his poker abilities in the dining room. Axel, Kairi and Sora were still sitting around the bonfire (minus the fire) chatting about what they were going to do as soon as they got home, well at least Kairi and Axel were.

Sora, was thinking, he had just had a really funny idea, a really bad idea to be honest but that particular part of his brain that discarded the bad ideas had started to shrink with every sip of beer and before he could even consider listening to the faint sound he had stood up, bend down in front of Kairi and gave her quick kiss right on the lips and then he had done the same thing… to Axel.

Sora backed down and kneeled in front of them, a sly smile on his lips, the expressions on their face was priceless, it reminded Sora of two big fishes and he found himself wishing for a camera.

"Sora what the fu-" Axel said after a while but was interrupted by Sora.

"You know that thing I wanted to tell you?" He asked him and Axel gave him a quick nod.

"I'm gay"

**Hi! It's me again there's something I wanted to say... lol... **

**Axel and Sora are just really good friends i'm saying this just in case u know... someone gets a funny ide... **

**And something else... the story Axel and Sora talked about, "Gold or Silver" it's a real story from Emma Bull and the play is real too is from Alejandro Casona. Well that it...**

** Reviews please?**


	4. And Then?

**Yay! Cookies for me for not taking AGES to post the next chapter :B**

**Long chapter and really funny too... i think.. ehehe**

**Okeeey got nothing interesting to say so i'll leave you to it!**

**Tell Me How**

Chapter Four

And then?

At first, Axel's jaw dropped flat on the floor but a second later he was laughing so hard he had to hug his stomach and he fell right on the floor; he was literally "rolling on the floor laughing".

Kairi, on the other hand, gave a soft whimper and ran away from the two boys.

"Kairi!" yelled Sora after her but she just kept running "Wha-"

"Sora, I think you should go after her" Axel said, he was no longer laughing and he looked worried.

Suddenly Sora didn't feel so drunk anymore. He nodded and ran after his friend. After only a few minutes of searching he found her at the camp's artificial lake, sitting on a log, crying.

"Kairi are you okay?" He asked her stupidly sitting beside her and putting an arm around her shoulder. Kairi moved away from Sora and glared at him but a second later she sighed deeply and looked away "No. I'm not okay, Sora…"

A little taken back by Kairi's tone, Sora was momentarily speechless but then he asked, "What's the problem?" he felt stupid, but he needed to ask, he was confused and he felt like he should know what was wrong; that it was his fault, somehow.

"You shouldn't have done that Sora…" Kairi said looking at him in the eye.

"What? Kiss you? It didn't mean anything…" he blurted out with out thinking but he regretted it right away.

Kairi had started crying again, big silent tears were falling from her violet eyes, but she ignored them and stood up, a scowl plastered on her face, and started walking in front of him, pacing,

"I know! …There's no need to point that out. I know it didn't! That's the problem! Don't you see?!"

She said, her voice getting higher by the second, was almost a yell by the time she finished but then she stood right in front of him and whispered,

"You are the problem".

'Why thank you. Now, could you please excuse me I need to go drown myself in the artificial lake' Sora thought looking down at his feet, not really knowing what to say, "I... I'm... sorry?" Kairi sighed again and asked him kindly, "Do you even know why you're sorry?"

Sora shook his head rapidly, "No I don't. But I am, I am sorry, I'm really sorry, Kairi. I don't know what I did but I never wanted to hurt you, ever an-" he talked fast and incoherent and Kairi raised a hand in front of him to make him stop; then she put her hands on Sora's knees and kneeled until they were in the same eye level, she was no longer crying and a small smile appeared in her pink lips.

"Calm down Sora. It's not your fault. It's nobody's fault. It's just... love sucks." She said in a sigh and chuckled.

"Love?" echoed Sora cocking his head, realization hitting him. Hard. How could I be so bloody stupid?! Why didn't I notice it before!? It's all so fucking obvious now! He thought hitting himself mentally on the head.

"Well yeah, you can't help who you fall in love with." Continued Kairi, sitting on the ground with her legs crossed Indian style.

Sora snorted at the comment, Don't I know that… he thought bitterly.

"What? Why did you snort at me?"

"Uh? No. I didn't- Never mind that. Kairi... I don't know what to say. I'm sorry I can't return your feelings? I do love you, but as a friend. Even if you hate me now." Sora said not looking at her and scratching the back of his head but before Kairi could say anything Sora kept talking, though this time kneeling in the ground in front on her.

"No. Scratch that. I don't want you to hate me, please Kairi. What should I do? I-"

"Oh my gawd! Could you just shut up for like a SECOND!?" Sora's mouth closed instantly and he nodded slowly, Kairi laughed silently. "I forgive you. Okay? Is that what you wanted to hear? There's nothing to forgive, but if that's what you want..." she sighed again and took Sora's hands in her own "I'll be okay Sora. And we can still be friends, I'll get over you, don't worry. It won't be hard!" She said winking at him.

Sora took his hands away from Kairi's and gave her a strong hug "Gee thanks!" he said and they both laughed while they stood up and made their way back to the camp buildings.

They walked silently, each lost in their own thoughts, or lack of them in Sora's case. His mind was blank, he just couldn't believe what had just happened, with the effects of alcohol almost entirely gone from his body, he was just starting to realize what an_ eventful _night this had been.

When they reached the door of the girls bedroom they looked at each other not really knowing what to say, then they both opened their mouth to say something just at the exact same time and laughed.

Sora wanted to say something, he didn't know what, just something, but Kairi had other plans; she smiled at him again and gave him a quick peck on the cheek before disappearing inside the room.

The brunet walked absently through the camp and ended up at the bonfire again, Axel was still there, sitting on a log with his legs spread up and leaning on his elbows, Sora was really thankful that he was still there, waiting for him, he really needed to clear his head.

"Thanks for waiting." he said as he sat in front of him, Axel looked up and smiled "No problemo…" he said taking a drag of his cigarette.

"I didn't know you smoked." Sora said furrowing his brows when he noticed the cancer stick in Axel's hand. Axel shrugged not having anything to say at Sora's statement.

"How long have you been doing it?"

"What, smoke?" Sora nodded and Axel thought for a moment before answering "Right after my mom died. My cousins "de-flowered" me on her funeral…" he said taking another drag.

"Why do you do it?" Sora asked him a whisper, Axel laughed.

"What's with the questions?" he asked but didn't wait for a response "I don't smoke all the time, just occasionally, I guess it makes me feel better about the fact that I'm gonna die before things get worse." he said smiling.

Sora gazed at the floor looking for something to throw at his friend but when he found nothing he just said "That's awful Axel…"

Axel shrugged again and mumbled something that sounded like "Whatever". They stayed silent for a while not necessarily uncomfortable when Sora remembered something.

"Hey! Your mom died? I didn't know that… Then… who was that lady that came to bring you your medicines?"

"That's my stepmother, my dad married her when I was 14, she's a total bitch." Axel said making a face, as if something with a disgusting sent was right under his nose. Then he suddenly started laughing.

"What?"

"I'm like a Disney princess! Putting up with my evil stepmother, waiting for my charming prince to rescue me…" he explained.

"Yeah, well don't look at me."

They laughed and talked all night about everything and about nothing. Axel asked him what had happened with Kairi and he told him everything he and Kairi had talked about at the lake. Much to Sora's annoyance Axel found Sora's lack of tact very amusing, he also mentioned he had suspected Kairi had a crush on him; two years before she had acted the same way around him.

Sora found that slightly interesting and ease minding, he thought about Axel and Kairi now, they were still good friends, so maybe things could really go back to the way they were, maybe they could still be friends.

As I said, they laughed and talked until dawn and they had a wonderful time, but there was something at the back of Sora's mind that kept bugging him. It was like a countdown reminding him he was going home.

'_6 hours to see Riku, 5 hours 50 minutes to see Riku, 5 hours 40 minutes…_' and so on.

…

Axel and Sora slept the whole trip back home. Axel sitting with his back against the window and his long legs extended over Sora's, and Sora using Axel's not to comfortable knees as a pillow.

When they arrived at the bus station they stayed together and looked around for their families; Kairi was the one who found hers first.

"Hey, that's my mom. Well boys, keep in touch." she said giving Axel a hug and turning to Sora.

Oh, how stupid of me to think things would be awkward…Sora thought sarcastically.

"Bye Kairi." He said tapping his fingers on his upper leg and looking down.

"Bye-" she started but was interrupted by Axel "I'll be right back, bye Kairi." he said and left.

"-Sora" Kairi finished with a smile.

"So… I'll let you know if a change my mind about being gay."

"That's not even funny." Kairi pointed out, although she was still smiling. Sora scratched the back of his head and laughed, "I know."

"Well, I should go…" she said giving him a bone crushing hug "Don't be a stranger okay?"

Sora watched her leave. She greeted her mother and got in the car where she waved at him before turning on the corner.

…

"Riku! Hurry up! We are late!"

"Stop whining!" Riku said to his best friend before pulling over on the bus station's parking lot. Said best friend glared at him, he was not winning!

He and Riku got out of the car and went to look for a special cute brunet boy.

"Can you see him?" Roxas asked the silver haired teen. Riku was about to point to where he had spotted Sora but stop dead when he saw a hot looking girl with brown reddish hair hug his So- I mean Sora.

Well, fuck me dry he has a girlfriend now?, He thought hopeless upon witnessing the hug.

But then the girl was gone so he starting walking toward his dream boy and stopped again when he heard someone scream his name; Sora's name.

Riku watched in utter horror as Sora turned around to see a tall red haired_ punk _pretending to run in slow motion toward him, he watched as Sora's face light up and laughed opening his arms wide to welcome the stranger and he watched as the damn fuck hugged Sora and lift him of the ground turning on his heels, then the punk looking teen put Sora safely on the ground and they laughed.

Fuck me dry and hand me to me mama, he was a BOYFRIEND?!

"Hey! There he is! Let's go Riku!" Roxas said suddenly grabbing Riku's wrist.

Together they approached the two friends; Roxas, wearing an ear to ear smile that was very uncharacteristic of him and Riku… Riku was looking kinda sick.

The blonde walked right behind Axel and standing on his tip toes he tapped him lightly on the shoulder. "Excuse me… May I steal my little brother from you for a moment?" he asked him still smiling. Axel, still laughing at his and Sora's most recent shenanigan turned around to look to the person talking to him and stopped laughing instantly; he blinked twice and moved to the side silently so that the blonde could welcome his brother.

An angel! He thought stupidly at Roxas's appearance.

"Roxy!" Sora yelled as he glomped his brother. Roxas returned the hug and a while later they pulled apart only enough to look at each other and then the bond moved his hand away from his brother's back and hit him on the nose with his middle finger.

"Oww. What was that for?"

"For calling my Roxy." Sora smiled at his brother again, he realized, now that he was back home, he had missed his blond older version of him more that he thought he had.

It's good to be home, he reckoned.

"Hey there Frodo… miss me?" Almighty Riku comes to ruin the tender moment.

Maybe it's not so good to be home.

"Miss you? Ha! You wish…" Sora said smirking.

A whole minute passed and no-one said a thing. Roxas was looking from Sora to Riku and vice versa, Riku was looking at Sora and Sora was trying to glare at him.

Axel was looking at Roxas but he eventually got tired of it and decided to fake a cough.

The other three boys looked at him; mission accomplished he thought smiling to himself and extended his hand to Roxas who took it and shook it briefly "Hi! I'm Axel".

"Roxas" the other responded with a one side smile. Axel look at him for a second longer and then turned to Riku and presented himself again, but Riku just looked at him and crossed his arms around his chest, Axel raised one slim eyebrow and used the hand that had been offered to Riku to run it throw his furious red hair.

"Okay…" Asshole, he thought as he turned to talk to Sora "I should go" he said to him with a sad smile.

Sora bit his lower lip and looked at his brother and Riku and making a quick decision he pushed Axel away from the other two's hearing range. Axel was not completely surprised by this, he supposed Sora wanted to tell him something that he didn't want the other two teens to hear, and he was right.

"So that's Riku, huh? He asked him not really expecting an answer "What a jerk."

"I know," Sora retorted scowling and pulling Axel down to bring him to his eye level, "Axel…"

"No, seriously Sora I don't like him." Sora's eyes widen at that statement and he cocked his head to the side looking confused. "He doesn't deserve you." Axel finished.

The brunet melted at that comment, he couldn't help it, but decided to ignore it nonetheless and said what he wanted to say, "Axel… promise me something. Promise me you won't forget about me…"

Axel blinked with a 'what the fuck' expression on his face. Sora had to admit to himself that that had sounded way too corny and tried again, "Just promise you'll keep in touch?"

He knew Axel was starting college this year and that he wasn't going to have a lot of free time, plus the red head lived almost 20 minutes away form his home and he did have a life of his own but Sora just wanted him close right now, although they had only just met he still was his best friend and he was the only one that knew Sora was gay, he needed him now and he wanted to make sure he could count on him.

Just like Sora had melted at Axel's statement, Axel melted at Sora's request. He kneeled in front of the chocolate hair boy and hugged him,

"You stupid," he said "Off course I'll keep in touch".

He stood up and ruffled Sora's hair "So… madam if you excuse me…" he said vowing "I must take your horses to the car wash." They both smiled and Axel turned to leave, "Call me if the model wannabe gives you any trouble." he told Sora, looking one last time at Roxas before disappearing through the crowd.

Sora turned on his heels and went where Riku and Roxas were waiting for him, Roxas took Sora's hand and push him through the station heading for the parking lot "Let's go home." he said and then he added in a whisper "You'll tell me later" wanting to know just who that Axel character was.

They got to Riku's car; Sora got on the back and lay occupying all three seats. They were ready to leave when Sora suddenly remembered something "My bags!" he said slapping his forehead "I forgot... shit! Wait here I'll go get them."

"Don't worry about it, I'll go." Riku said getting out of the car.

Okay, who are you and what have you done to Riku?, Roxas thought amused.

"Besides you probably won't be able to carry them all by your self." Riku added as a second thought before leaving. The blonde laughed and pinched Riku's lower back as he was getting out of the car, "Be nice" He warned him.

While they were waiting for Riku to return Roxas looked lazily through the window at a bizarre man that was leaning on a column, a few meters away from them. The men had long black hair pulled on a low ponytail, a black leather jacket with a wife-beater underneath and dark jeans, he also had an eye patch on his right eye and right beside him was the most monstrous motorcycle Roxas had ever seen, it was big enough to carry three large men.

Then, out of nowhere, a boy that looked right about Roxas age came running toward the 'pirate' guy and hugged him leaving a kiss on his eye patch, the teen had dirty blond hair and a peculiar combo between a mullet and a wide mohawk that looked strangely good on him.

"DEMYX!" Coming from the same place as the mullet boy; a redhead that Roxas acknowledged as Sora's new friend Axel, came carrying two big bags, "C'mon man! You said you were gonna help!" Roxas heard the guy yell annoyed.

"Hey Sora look, it's your friend." He told his brother, who sat on the car to look.

They saw as Axel, the blonde and the pirate looking guy got on the motorcycle, the dark haired man was driving, mullet boy was behind him and Axel on the back but as soon as he sat there the blonde boy jumped and yelped and Axel starting laughing.

Sora laugh too and Roxas looked at his brother wondering just who the hell was the guy his little brother had befriended.

And then, just when Riku was coming back they were gone; Riku put the bags on the trunk and got in the driver's seat, "Ready to go?" he asked.

"Yes mommy! Let's go to the ice-cream shop!" Roxas said jokingly in a high pitch voice and they when on their way.

Sora, afraid of what Riku might say to him (after all he did had an entire month to invent new nicknames for the brunet) pretended to be asleep the whole ride home, his eyes closed and using his arms as a pillow he looked quite peaceful but his mind was racing. He kept thinking just what the heck was he going to do now that he finally understood his feelings toward his brother's best friend and thinking if it wasn't illegal for a human to be so damn handsome.

Roxas looked at his little brother through the rear-view mirror and smiled "He's asleep" he whispered to Riku, "Looks like he had a good time, huh?"

"Mmm? Oh yeah, good for him." responded the silver hair teen with his mind somewhere in the back seat maybe.

The blond looked at his friend for a moment and smirked "You know what's weird?"

"Besides your brother?"

"You." Roxas responded, letting the previous comment slip by.

"Me?" Riku asked him raising one slim eye brow and looking briefly at him before looking back at the road.

"Well yeah. You have been bitching about every single thing for exactly a month now and this morning, out of nowhere, you were happy," He sighed and continued "And I know you Riku, you are never happy in the morning, unless you just got laid."

"Your point being?"

Roxas smirked again and looked intently at him before answering, "If I didn't know better I would say you missed a certain brunet."

Riku said nothing for a while and Sora, still pretending to be asleep, practically stopped breathing waiting for an answer from the jock.

"Or maybe I got laid last night…"

Roxas shook his head and laughed lightly taking his blue eyes of Riku and redirecting them to the window, "Yeah, sure…" he said making it clear he didn't believed him.

…

**_Ring!_**

"Sora! Can you get that?"

"Uhm… No. I'm busy!" Sora was lying on a couch lazily picking at his belly button. He sighed heavily and got up to get the door.

'Oh God…' was the only thing that came to his mind as he saw who was standing outside his home.

But it wasn't god; far from it… It was Riku, Riku with his head down, looking at his cell, silver bangs falling over his aquamarine eyes. Riku with a tight black t-shirt and dark blue jeans that looked specially made for his muscled legs.

It's not fair… Sora thought as he fought his jaw to stay up.

The silver-hair teen raised his head when the door was opened…

'Oh god'

Sora was standing there wearing nothing more than a pair of baggy jeans that looked far too big for him.

It's not fair… Riku thought but greeted Sora as usual anyway.

"Midget."

"Jackass." Sora said slamming the door in his face. He smiled to himself and turned away from the door but found his brother scowling at him from the top of the stairs, he shrugged and threw himself on the couch again while Roxas went and opened the door for Riku again, who showed his tongue at Sora in a childish way as he was coming in.

Sora rolled his electric blue eyes at Riku,

"Do that again and I'll bite it off" he warned, buttoning a white shirt Roxas had brought him from their room.

Riku opened his mouth to reply, or maybe just to stick his tongue out again, but Roxas thought this was a good time as any to jump on his friends back.

"Ouff! Rox!" Riku complained but at the same time he secured the blonde's legs on his waist for him not to fall.

"Shouldn't we get going?" Sora asked biting his lower lip as he watched his brother pushed the silver bangs that fell on Riku's eyes behind his hear.

Lucky bastard, he thought.

Five minutes later the three of them were once again in Riku's car on their way to Axel's home.

Only a week had gone by since Sora had returned from camp, but he had already missed, and needed, his new found friend so much on those seven days that he was really exited to see him tonight, plus the redhead had invited him and Roxas to an actual 'college party'; Riku was coming along as bonus, he was the only one with a car after all.

Axel, truthful to his word had called Sora almost everyday that week just to keep in touch. They had talked for hours, usually about a silver haired teen and occasionally about someone's blond brother, he seemed to be very interested in Roxas, but Sora supposed Axel was just messing with him cause he knew his "your brother is hot" statements annoyed him. They had also talked about Axel's friends, the ones him and Roxas had seen on the bus station.

Xigbar was the black-haired one and Demyx the dirty blonde. They were his roommates and best friends, he had grown up with Demyx and they had been living together with 'Xig' for almost a year now.

Another ten minutes, and they arrived at a huge house on the suburbs. Still early for the party, but the red head had insisted that they should go earlier so they could eat some pizzas and get to know each other a little bit more before the party.

"Nice…" Roxas gaped in awe as he stepped out of the car. Sora climbed down and started walking rapidly toward the door eager to see his friend, then the front door opened and a big shiny smile popped from inside, followed by the mullet boy, Demyx.

"Hey!" he cheered happily but as soon as he took a second look at them his smile disappeared and a look of disappointment appeared in its place, "Awww you are not the pizza…"

Sora smiled at him and opened his mouth to introduce himself but Axel suddenly appeared in the doorway pushing Demyx out of the way to greet the brunet. Sora's smile widened and he took the last steps toward the house and hugged the redhead that was waiting there with a matching smile.

"You owe me big time for inviting Ken…" Axel whispered to Sora talking out of the corner of his mouth and waving to the other two teens that were still standing near the car.

Sora chuckled and stepped inside offering his hand to Demyx that was standing next to Axel peering outside through a small window.

"Hi, you are Demyx, right? I'm Sora!" the petite chocolate haired teen said smiling "I'm sorry we are not pizza". Demix laughed loudly and took Sora's hand with both of his,

"It's oka- Look! it's the pizza!" dropping Sora's hand Demyx ran zigzagging not to crush into Riku, Axel or Roxas that were still standing on the porch toward a skinny looking guy carrying a package that looked heavier than him.

The poor guy didn't see Demyx until he was right under his nose and he must have thought the blond was trying to rob him or something because he dropped the pizzas and ran away through the street yelling, Demix turned to look at the other four with a stunned face and then he started running after the guy to make him stop but only made it worse cause the boy started flailing his arms like a monkey when he saw Demyx following him.

The four teens standing on the front yard had seen the whole show and were now laughing their guts out,

"Why do you think he's doing that for?" Axel managed to squeeze out, talking about the guys frantic arms movements.

Roxas wiped a single tear from his eye and shrugged, "Dunno... self defense?" he tried, and they immediately started laughing again.

A few seconds later, when they were all able to breathe again, Axel invited them inside and showed them around. The place was huge and, though it looked nice and cozy from outside, inside it looked like a battle field or simply like it would with three teens living alone. All the furniture was different in equal prize, shape, color and state but the house still looked amazingly great.

After a quick and superficial tour they headed to the garage where they found the dark-haired man crouched over a lot of wires and stereos and cursing under his breath.

"Guys this is Xigbar." Axel said clearing his throat to make their presence acknowledged. Xigbar stood up and grabbed a previously discarded wife-beater smiling and nodding once,

"Dudes," he said as a greeting manner pulling his shirt down and stepping closer to the group to shake hands.

"Xig, this is Sora, his brother Roxas and Ruki."

Sora starting laughing out loud and Xigbar smiled at him slightly confused as he was moving to shake Riku's hand who scowled and corrected the redhead, "It's Riku" he said when a big callused hand was presented to him.

Axel cocked his head to the side "Really?" he asked trying to look surprised but failing miserably, "Anyway let's go outside, that's were the party is taking place, c'mon Sora you have to see the pool it's awesome!" he said grabbing Sora's wrist and leading them through a door in the garage that headed to the enormous backyard.

They sat on some plastic chairs that were spread out on the yard and a second later Demyx came carrying the boxes of pizza with a huge smile on his face he set the boxes on a table opening one of them and offering a slice of pizza to everyone before grabbing one for himself and sitting on Xigbar's lap; who hugged him by the waist with one hand.

"So… you three live here all by yourselves?" asked Roxas making small talk after a few seconds of silence.

Demyx; who had just taken a bite of his pizza nodded rapidly making it seem he had a rubber ball stuck in his throat.

"How on earth did you find this place?" Riku asked next; looking at the pool with shiny eyes.

"Demyx here is pretty loaded!" Axel said pointing at Demyx with his pizza, he teen pouted and Xigbar squeezed the blonde's stomach gently, "You know that's not true dude." he said smirking.

Demyx smiled at Xigbar's touch and stuck his tongue out at Axel "My family is loaded, not me." he said sighing, "My godfather bought this place for me after I left home," he explained, "with the munny he gave us, plus Xiggy's job and the part time jobs Axel and I have during college time we manage pretty well."

"Yeah." Axel agreed taking another slice of pizza, "It's a big house and sometimes it's hard to keep up but we got attached to it and… we didn't want to offend Dem's godfather."

"Nh," Xigbar's voice was heard somewhere behind Demyx "He's a cool dude but he also scares the shit out of me."

Demyx rolled his eyes; "He believes Freddy is the head of the mafia or something" he explained and chuckled when Xigbar pinched him lightly on his belly.

"I actually agree with Xigbar on this one;" Axel said "_Freddy _sure looks made for the job."

The three of them kept discussing about Demyx's godfather but Sora had wanted to ask something for a while now and he seized the opportunity to do it when the older trio became silent for a second.

"Uhm… how come you left home Demyx?" he said looking at him and looking at his knees immediately after "If… it's okay I ask…?" he finished in a smaller voice, he wanted to know why this guy, that looked much younger than Xigbar and Axel was living alone.

Demyx smiled again, he seemed to do that a lot (not that someone's complaining, he had a beautiful smile), and Xigbar wrapped both hands over his stomach smirking; "My family is obsessed with social status and appearance, they didn't approve of Xigbar… uhm… actually they really hated him…" he corrected himself chuckling, "First they told me to dump hi-" He was interrupted by Xigbar snorting "As If!" and he continued as if nothing had happened. "I obviously refused… then they told him to dump me and when that didn't work either they tried to send me away, so I left." he finished with another bright smile.

"That's cute…" Sora said with out thinking and regretted it right away turning a deeper shade of red than Axel's hair when eleven eyes looked at him amused.

"Uh… I mean-" he tried but he really didn't know what to say so he sighed and scratched the back of his neck smiling shyly at the others, who, blinking once or twice burst out laughing.

Only Riku didn't laughed but looked down instead, hiding his face behind silver hair to cover the sweet smile that appeared in his lips.

'You are cute Sora, really fucking cute' he thought, unable to help it.

…

"Did you really think I would do that!?" Kairi yelled at Sora, "You are so… stupid, you are… so…**drunk**!" she sighed and ran a hand through her hair not wanting to deal with another drunk Sora, not after the last night at the camp.

"Why don't you just cool down a bit, throw yourself in the pool or something!" she offered shaking her hand and turning away from him.

It was three in the morning and yes, Sora was drunk. Again.

He had spend the last hour and a half looking at Kairi flirt with Riku under a large willow and not being able to find his brother or Axel he had been absently drinking anything and _everything_ that was at hands reach. And after a while he had felt like he couldn't look at them anymore, like he wanted to throw up, all over Riku if possible… but instead of turning away he headed strait forwards them…

…

"Squeeze me Riku…" Sora had said standing awkwardly still and looking dead serious.

'WHEN, WHERE, HOW!?' Riku thought inwardly drooling but cleared his throat and said "I beg your pardon?" crossing his arms around his chest.

Sora rolled his eyes at him and sighed annoyed,

"I said _excuse_ me Riku. I need to talk with Kairi." he said grabbing Kairi's wrist and yanking her toward him and away from a speechless Riku.

When they were at a safe distance Sora stopped pulling Kairi away and turn to look at his supposed friend.

"Sora what's wrong?" She had asked him not looking concerned at all as she waved at Riku.

Sora grabbed her wrist again to stop her from waving, "That's what's wrong. Why are you flirting with him? Of all the people here..." he said the last part more to himself than to her.

They discussed for almost ten minutes before Kairi left him acting offended returning to Riku who was leaning against the willow looking at them with a confused expression on his face.

Bitch!, Sora thought scowling and tuning on his heel toward the table full of drinks but stopped dead on his tracks and grabbed his head,

'Wow-ah. I'm dizzy… dizzy... You know... maybe the pool is not such a bad idea.' He thought stupidly.

"What the fuck is he doing?" Riku murmured looking at Sora as he walked in a not-so-strait-line toward the pool.

**_SPLASH!!_**

"Sora!" Riku found himself running and diving inside the pool after the brunet at an incredible speed. He got a hold on him immediately and pulled him up and out cursing under his breath.

"You stupid asshole! What were you thinking you- you… damn kid!? You could have drowned! What are you a moron? Did you mom dropped you on your head when you were a baby!?" he spluttered out with out stopping to breathe as he shoved Sora through the yard and into the house. Ignoring every estranger that came to ask what had happened.

Sora just let him do as he pleased acting more like a puppet than a human with a blank look on his face.

When they got inside Riku found Xigbar in the kitchen and asked him for a towel, with out asking any questions Xigbar told him where Axel's room was and where he could find clean towels; and with a quick thankful nod Riku dragged Sora up the stairs and up to Axel's room.

Grabbing him by the shoulders Riku carefully sat the brunet on Axel's bed and rapidly went to retreat a towel from the bathroom next door, but when he came back Sora was shivering uncontrollably.

The silver hair teen sighing heavily kneeled in front of him and started taking the teens clothes off slowly.

This was just painfully awkward and Riku tried to shrug away the fact that he was living one of his deepest dreams, only that in his dreams Sora wasn't drunk and Riku wasn't taking his clothes off cause he was wet and cold and he could catch a cold.

It's not fair, he thought for the second time that day unbuttoning Sora's shirt.

And to make things worst Sora wasn't helping. At all.

He was just sitting there motionless watching Riku's eyes as he undressed him and ran a towel over his legs, arms, torso and back; then, when Riku moved a little closer to him and started drying his damp hair Sora blinked, noticing how close Riku's face was from his own and also noticing the strong, burning and growing urge he suddenly felt for kissing the soft lips that where so close to him and so far away at the same time… So he did it.

With out thinking about it too much he leaned closer, closed his eyes and pressed his lips against Riku's softly.

Riku stood perfectly still until Sora broke the kiss and then he pushed himself off the floor and away from Sora.

He was dying to kiss the brunet back but he couldn't because Sora was drunk and he wasn't; and Sora didn't know what he was doing and, to be perfectly honest not even Riku knew what he was doing…

He thought the best thing to do right now was leave the room; he thought he OUGHT to leave the room before the lost control of himself.

Riku slowly turned and headed to the door opening it to get the hell away from there but as he set shaking hand on the handle, he heard Sora's body leave the bed and come close to his.

"Riku…" Sora whispered on Riku's ear "Stay…"

...

**don't you just looove cliffhangers?? XD don't kill me...**

**REVIEWS PLEASE! i'll give a cookie too '3'**


	5. The After Party

**omg u r going to kill me! making u wait so long and for THIS?! so fucking short T.T**

**anyway i promise it's complettly WORTH IT :D next chapter it's really looong and it has smex! and given the fact that i never wrote a sex scene before i asked the best yaoi writer in the whole word to help me with it and she did and it's so fucking great... -is happy-**

**i know i said chapter 4 was my favorite but chapter sex i mean six...wow XD**

**Now applauses for my new beta VanillaJewels!! Yeah!! -shakes pom poms- :D i already love her, i'm sure u'll like her too '3'**

**REVIEWS WILL MAKE ME WRITE FASTER -hides from the tomatoes-**

...

**Tell Me How**

Chapter Five.

The After Party.

Sora woke up late in the afternoon and millions of questions were shot through his brain the second he opened his eyes. One of the questions was, "where the hell am I?" but that question was answered right after he took a glimpse at the bedroom he was in; it was Axel's room, the place just screamed the redhead's name. He ran a hand through his muddled hair in relief.

Now, he just had to find out why he was there and what he had done last night he thought as he leaned on his elbows to sit up but, froze mid way there and he looked down at himself, 'Uhm… why am I naked?' he wondered pouting.

Sora took a deep breath and sat on the bed letting out a loud gasp when he did. His ass hurt, why did his ass hurt?! He was just about to freak the hell out about it when a worse pain took a hold of his attention, his head was killing him. The brunet stood perfectly still for a few seconds and snorted when he got dizzy just by trying to get out of the bed.

'Nice to meet you hangover, I'm Sora', said teen thought and made the always breakable promise of never drinking again as he made his way to the bathroom; luckily not bumping into any of the house owners, and he took a long hot shower. When he was done he wrapped a towel on his waist and leaned over the sink to catch his breath. Sighing again to brace himself at the view he looked at his reflection, nothing was out of place,

'Except for that huge hickey on my neck' he thought as he ran one his smooth fingers over the almost blue spot on his neck and closed his eyes trying to remember.

A series of flashes and images came to him but none of them stayed long enough to make sense.

Now, a very scared Sora was looking at him from the mirror when he opened his eyes again. He looked down at his hands to take his eyes off himself but what he saw there made him panic,

'Is that…blood?' Had he scratched someone? Sora ran his hands painfully through his hair and closed his eyes again fisting his hands between strands of brown hair trying to remember something, _anything_… and then he caught it, just another flash, an image of himself arching his back at a really strong feeling, one that lingered between heaven and hell. He had slept with someone last night and not just someone, he had slept with Riku.

'Shit!'

…

"Where were you?" Standing at the bottom of the stairs with his arms crossed over his chest was Roxas. He didn't look mad or concerned just amused.

"Uhm I…" said Riku flushing and pointing to the corridor behind him "He…"

"Riku? What happened?" the blonde asked starting to worry.

'Oh god what do I tell him?' Riku thought panicked and cleared his throat, "Roxas… I… uhm… Sora… he was drunk and I… took him upstairs and got his clothes off…" he gulped and looked at his hands, "…and he passed out, he's sleeping in Axel's room." he finished quickly stumbling on the last words, he couldn't do it. He couldn't tell his best friend he had just taken his little's brothers virginity.

Roxas blinked and then he smiled amused and a little confused, "Why did you take his clothe off?"

"Cause he threw himself in the pool." Leaning on the kitchen's door frame was Xigbar, looking intently at Riku. Roxas rose an eyebrow looking from his friend to Xigbar and back,

"Wh- What?" he asked.

"Oh, don't worry about it, he's fine, Riku here took care of it, right dude?" Xigbar said never taking his eye of the silver-hair teen, Roxas' eyebrow rose a little higher and he looked back at Riku, who flushed again and looked at his feet,

"I have to go. Now." he murmured and left practically running and with out looking back.

Roxas watched him leave with his mouth slightly open and then he turned back to Xigbar silently asking him for an explanation. He didn't know what had just happened but he knew Xigbar knew a hell of a lot more than he did, but the man just shrugged and left, leaving him alone to wonder just how the heck he was getting home now.

…

"So… How much more 'til your place?"

"You didn't have to walk me home Axel." Roxas said rolling his eyes at the taller teen, "You came because you wanted to so stop bitching, okay?

Axel smiled throwing his head back and sighing; this had not been a good idea. He was feeling dizzy and weak, he had forgotten to take his medicine and he shouldn't have left home but get some sleep instead, but no matter now bad he was feeling…

It was worth it, he thought looking down at the blonde walking beside him, but he wasn't there.

The redhead stopped walking and turned to find Roxas standing a few steps behind with his hands shoved down his jacket's pockets and a ghost of a smile on his lips,

"This is my house" he said pointing briefly with a head movement. Axel shrugged and walked lazily back to where the blonde was, they walked to the front door steps together and Roxas unlocked the door and then he turned to say goodbye but he was unable to speak when he found a pair of mesmerizing green eyes looking at him. Really close.

Axel was slowly leaning closer to him with an insecure look on his face. Was he going to kiss him?

'Well I can't let that happen, can I? So… okay… I did spend the whole night talking with him and I did have the best time since… I don't remember when, not that I don't have fun with Riku; it's just… this is different, he's different. No matter how weird it sounds Axel makes me feel… different… and just what the HELL am I thinking!? I barely know the guy! I'm not letting him kiss me. No way!'

Roxas came out of his daze to stop Axel but he found the redhead fully standing and with his head cocked to the side looking at him quizzically, "You okay?" he asked him and Roxas shook his head and chuckled at himself, "Yeah, just peachy" he said smiling.

"Well I guess I'll see you tomorrow. Bye Axel, and thanks for walking me home." He got inside and shut the door quickly and as soon as he did he bumped his forehead against it and sighed feeling annoyingly confused and, for some reason, slightly _disappointed_.

**_TUD!_**

"What the hell!?" Roxas heard the sound of something heavy hitting the floor so he opened the door to look and saw Axel kneeling on all fours.

"Shit! Are you okay? What happened?!" He asked him jumping the front stairs and kneeling beside the redhead.

"Nothing, nothing, I'm fine, just a little tired that's all." Axel said smiling reassuringly at him but as he wanted to stand again he stumbled and grabbed the blond's shoulder for balance. Roxas put one of his soft hands over the one Axel had on his shoulder and smirked, "Yeah, I'm not buying that." he said searching for Axel's face to check for a fever, but Axel was hiding it with his hair by looking down.

"I… -sigh- I forgot to take the damn medicine _again_, okay?" he said, "I've got talasemia and I get just a little weak from time to time. I just need to get home and rest. I'm fine…" he smiled again finally looking at Roxas face and then he stepped away from him and stood up perfectly strait and made a pose, putting his hands at both sides of his waist and spreading his long fingers, "…See?" he said.

Roxas looked at the man from head to toe and gulped, trying not to literally drool all over Axel…

'Yeah, you are.' He said inwardly and mentally slapped himself on the head right after, 'What the fuck Roxas!?'

He was about to let him go but Axel fluttered again and grabbed his head.

"Okay. That's it. You are staying here." Roxas said making up his mind. The tall teen shook his head to argue but Roxas gave him a very authoritative, murderous look that made Axel gulp, "Yes, sir!" he said and followed the blonde inside.

…

Sora stayed in the bathroom a good twenty minutes just staring at his blurry reflection before heading painfully slow downstairs. He begged to all the gods he could think of for no-one to be home or, at least, that they were still sleeping, but his wish wasn't granted, because he found Xigbar in the kitchen.

As Sora walked in the man turned to him and smiled sweetly motioning the brunet to sit in the only chair in the kitchen that had cushions; Sora returned the smile shyly and complied.

"Ya' hungry shrimp?"

"Yeah, I'm starving." Xigbar grabbed a pan from the stove and handed Sora a plate with bacons and eggs, "There ya' go, best b n' es from the worlds greatest cook." he said winking. The teen smiled again thankful and started devouring his food while Xigbar sat across from him and watched him eat, "Any good?"

"Grwaep" Sora mumbled with his mouth full. They stayed in silence for a few minutes while Sora finished his brunch, and when he was done Xigbar took the plate away from him and put it in the dishwasher, "If we didn't have this thing no-one would wash the dishes" he said jokingly as he sat back down, "So… had a good night?"

"Waddaya mean?" the teen asked flushing and looking down at his thumbs, fidgeting with them.

"Nothing dude! Relax…" Xigbar said smiling and waving a hand in the air, but then he leaned on the table to make eye contact looking completely serious, "Look Sora, I know you barely know me and that I don't look like a trustful fellow but if ya' wanna talk about last night… It might be good for ya'…"

The brunet sighed exasperated running a hand through his hair and looking up, "I can't talk about last night cause… I don't know what the fuck happened!" he said slamming a fist on the table. The older man nodded slowly and gave him a sad smile, "And what are you going to do about it?"

Sora thought for a few seconds and said, "Nothing…" Then looking at Xigbar's disapproving expression he added, "At least for now… Better think and talk than talk and regret."

There was a knock on the door and Xigbar stood up to get it, "Just don't think about TOO much, okay?" he said as he crossed the kitchen and headed to the living room. Sora nodded though Xigbar didn't see him, and he dropped his head on the table slowly; it still hurt like hell, then he took a deep breathe trying to wash away all thoughts and feelings and looked up again when he heard two people, instead of just Xigbar, taking seats at the table.

"Axel! Did you just come in? Where were you!?" Axel was the one now sitting in front of him, wearing the same clothes he sported last night and looking as if he hadn't gotten any sleep at all.

"I was at your place actually" he said smiling sheepishly. The smile that had climbed its way up to Sora's face at the sight of his friend banished completely and his eyebrows rose so far up his forehead that they were hidden by his chocolate hair.

"Don't worry; I didn't molest your brother…" Axel said placing his right hand in his chest, where his heart was. Then his smile grew wider and he said, "Though I wanted to."

Sora threw a napkin at him and laughed, "You asshole! Be thankful I wasn't looking and grabbed the napkin by mistake! I wanted to throw you this knife!" he said waving the knife in his face.

…

About forty minutes later, Sora asked Axel for a ride home, the redhead said he would take him on Xig's bike cheerfully, but Xigbar burst his little bubble with two words, "As If!"

After much preying and whining from Axel, Xigbar decided he would take the kid home so he could get away from Axel and, at the same time, keep Axel away from his dear bike.

So Xigbar gave Sora a ride home and the teen thanked him for both the ride and the small talk with a brief hug before going inside his house.

...

**talasemia it's a type of anemia that it's inherited from parents to child and it's grave of evilnes, eheh i'm so stupid, depends on the parent type of blood. I know about it cause i have it, no biggie thought it's not life threatening, just fucking annoying :T**


	6. Then and Now

**okay first of all, THANKS SO MUCH FOR THE REVIEWS AND FAVES!!1oneoneeleven! I LOVE YOUS!!1 thanksthanksthaksthaks 3**

**second, thanks to my editors again -hugs editor-**

**third, sex scene u r about to enjoy was written by my platonic love: Lunarwench (y!gallery) i told her how i wanted it to go and she wrote sinful lovemaking for me :) then, i haded some gilt, conversation and the rest of the stupid things i write...**

**fourth, after the sex scene theres some important drama so if you don't want porn just read the last part.**

**fifth, i have a black eye :D it hurts ¬¬ REVIEW TO MAKE MY EYE FEEL BETTER?**

**Tell Me How**

Chapter Six

Then and Now.

Riku froze at those soft needy words spilled from Sora's slightly slurred mouth. Against his better judgment, he closed the door and turned back towards the lovely brunet. Sora was staring at him, eyes bright from the alcohol and also...desire. Riku felt his stomach flutter at the look Sora was giving him.

Staring up at Riku, Sora felt the sudden urge to kiss him again, and he raised himself up on unsteady toes to press his mouth to Riku's once more.

When he felt Sora's tentative kiss, Riku almost lost control and pushed them both back to the bed, but instead, he wrapped his arms around Sora's slim waist and pulled their bodies tight together. His hands settled on that slim waist and kneaded the supple flesh there as he deepened the kiss, tilting his head and delving deeply into his mouth. A low groan rumbled from his chest and he felt his stomach muscles clench again, forcing him to press his hips closer to Sora. As he felt himself thickening in his pants, he noticed an answering bulge pressing insistently into his thigh. With a growl full of lust and gilt, he picked Sora off the floor and pulled one of the boy's slender legs around his hips, rubbing their erections together roughly.

At the feel of Riku's arousal hard against his own, Sora moaned, soft and sweet, bringing up his other leg to drape over Riku's hip. He grinded them together, acting purely on instinct and wrapped his arms tight around Riku's strong neck, letting the older boy dominate the kiss.

Riku's cock twitched as Sora ground into him, making him almost weak in the knees. The sounds of the boy's moans drove him almost crazy and he let himself lean back against the door, careful not to crush Sora's legs where they twined around him. Needing to be closer, he tightened his arms around Sora's slightly moist back, feeling the heat of the boy's bare chest seeping through his shirt. Though Sora's tongue was clumsy in his mouth, Riku found his fumblings to be more arousing than any other kiss he'd ever had before, and he stroked that awkward pink muscle with his own, coaxing it out for more intimate play. He pulled back his tongue, making Sora's follow it into his mouth and he bit down on it gently, eliciting a gasp from Sora's occupied mouth.

The bite had surprised him, and Sora retaliated by pulling back his tongue and chomping down on Riku's lower lips, tugging on the sensitive flesh with his teeth. He may have still been mostly drunk, but he was careful enough to keep from breaking the skin. With Riku's lip held captive with his teeth, Sora trailed his tongue across that trapped flesh, teasing even though he wasn't doing it on purpose.

Another sharp spike of heat rushed to Riku's cock, making him spin them around and pin the smaller boy to the wall, grinding hard in between Sora's open legs. A heated groan tore itself from his throat and he began to thrust into the boy, their duel erections rubbing and stroking each other through their clothing.

Sora whimpered, the rough ridge of Riku's jeans slightly too coarse on his cock, but it still felt so good, and he arched into Riku, begging for more as the older boy bent down to suck on his pulse point through the thin skin of his neck. "Aaahhh"

At the sound of Sora's moan, Riku thrust forward once more, almost coming, but he managed to hold off, and he forced himself to stop, panting heavily and leaning back far enough to look down into Sora's slightly dazed eyes. The boy looked back up at him, his lips red and swollen from Riku's kisses, and his cheeks flushed with arousal. The sight made Riku whimper softly. He could see a combination of lust and drunkenness in Sora's bright eyes, warning him that Sora wasn't exactly coherent at the moment and that he shouldn't be taking advantage of his best friend's brother like this. 'I'm so going to hell for this', he thought biting his lower lip.

Sora could see Riku beginning to doubt if he should continue, so he decided to take matters into his own hands. Unhooking his thighs from around the larger boy's waist, he lowered his feet to the floor, seeing Riku's disappointment at the act, and then he snuck out from between the wall and Riku's hot body. Grabbing the collar of Riku's shirt, he pulled him along towards the bed, not realizing how close they actually were, and falling back against the mattress.

Riku fell with Sora, still held by his shirt collar, and he couldn't keep from grunting as he bounced against the boy's body. "Sora..." He said, trying to move off of the younger boy, but as thin fingers bunched in his shirt, pulling him back down and Riku had no choice but to allow himself to be lowered back down to Sora's waiting mouth.

Their lips connected again and Sora moaned into Riku's mouth, his tongue quickly snaking out again to wrestle with the older boy's. His fingers released Riku's shirt when he was sure the silver-haired boy wouldn't try to escape again, and he arched his neck off the bed to suckle on Riku's tongue.

Sora's urgent little kisses were like a shot straight to Riku's cock, and he couldn't hold back anymore, his hands slipped down on their own to sneak under the elastic waistband of Sora's boxers. Forcing himself to break away from that sweet mouth, Riku managed to get out between panting, "Sora...Are you sure you want this?"

In answer, Sora smiled slowly, his own hands reaching down to cover Riku's and push them and his boxers further down his hips.

'I'll take that as a yes, then' Riku thought and he sat up on his knees, all hesitation gone as he helped the brunet to peel his boxers off his legs, then he chucked them somewhere onto the floor. Then he turned back to Sora and his breath hitched at the sight. Sora was spread on the sheets, legs wide and open, inviting him to nestle between them. The boy's face was reddened and a thin layer of sweat frosted his delicate brow, but the real treasure lay between his wide open thighs. Riku felt the sudden urge to lean down and lap it up with his tongue.

Laying back like that, all exposed and vulnerable, should have made Sora feel shy, but for some reason; he later guessed it was because of the alcohol in his blood, he was more confidant than he'd ever been. The way Riku was staring at him, devouring him with his eyes, made him feel brazen, like he was in control, and he loved it. Scooting back and sitting up on the bed, he frowned at Riku,

"Too many clothes on...S'not fair..." he said.

Riku swallowed thickly, watching that beautiful tanned body slide up the bed, and he reached for his shirt, pulling it over his head. Then he unbuttoned his jeans and slid down the zipper, shoving the pants, along with his boxers, to his knees and leaning back to kick them off.

While Riku was on his back kicking off his jeans, Sora took advantage to climb atop him and straddle his naked hips. He sat down and felt the thick ridge of Riku's cock fitting into the groove of his ass. Riku hissed and stilled below him, eyes slamming shut as Sora wiggled atop him. The brunette loved how Riku seemed so overwhelmed by him. It made him feel good. In control. With a wolfish, slightly drunk smile, he growled down at the older boy trapped between his legs.

Riku couldn't stop his hips from bucking up into the air as Sora shifted above him, his tight ass clenching around Riku's cock. He wanted to bury himself into that willing body, but he couldn't stop the nagging voice in the back of his head that kept telling him this was wrong. Sora was still drunk, and not acting like he would if he was sober, or so he thought. But...When would Riku ever get another chance like this? This beautiful boy, the boy he had been in love with for so long, pressed against him, wanting him, needing him? He had to take advantage, or else he would kill himself later,

'I might end up killing myself anyway', he thought not really caring as his hands rose to grip Sora's hips as the younger boy raised himself slightly.

Reaching down between his legs, Sora curled his fingers around Riku's throbbing length, standing it straight up and pointing to his body. He began to press down.

"Oh god, yes...Wait. Wait! No!" Riku grabbed Sora's lowering hips and stopped the boy, breathing heavily. "No, Sora, you'll get hurt." Helping the confused boy to slide down by his side, Riku rolled over and reached over into the bedside table, opening the little drawer there. He preyed for Axel to have something they could use. And, of course, there was something. Two somethings. A half-empty box of condoms and a little clear bottle of what could only be lube. Suddenly Axel didn't seem to be that bad of a guy.

Sora blinked, trying to clear his blurry vision, and he slumped back again as he watched Riku tear open a little square piece of plastic. He recognized it as a condom, though he had never used one before. Fascinated, he followed Riku's movements, the unrolling of the little rubber sheath over Riku's very excited erection, the slick sheen of the lubricant as Riku dribbled it down onto himself, coating his cock with a few strokes of his hand.

Riku gasped faintly at the feel of his own tight fingers wrapped around himself, and he pulled them away only with the knowledge that a much tighter grip awaited. He rose to his knees and slowly crawled closer to Sora, where the boy was reclining back and watching him with hungry eyes. Kneeling between the brunette's eyes, Riku brought his still slick fingers down between Sora's open thighs, trailing his fingers lightly along the underside of Sora's twitching cock, leaving a faint wet path, moving down that sensitive skin.

Sora shuddered as Riku's fingers played at his entrance, circling around the puckered pink flesh and kneading it gently. His hips squirmed against his will and he spread his legs wider, arching up into that teasing caress. He wanted more. So he growled "Mmmnhg more…"

At the sound of Sora begging, Riku couldn't hold back anymore, and he thrust his fingers in, immediately regretful at the way Sora whimpered at his quick insertion. He withdrew then, carefully pulling his digits out. "I'm sorry, Sora."

Sora whimpered again as he felt Riku pulling those fingers out, and he reached down with one grasping hand to stop him. Feverish blue eyes met restrained green. "No..." he just said. Then he slowly moved Riku's fingers back into him, his grip failing as Riku once again took control.

His mouth hanging open, Riku panted harshly, needing to bury himself into that hot willing body, but he slowly opened his fingers, stretching carefully. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt Sora, more than he already thought he was. Another finger slipped inside and worked in tandem with the other two, scissoring and preparing Sora's virgin body.

The brunet writhed on the bed, overcome with the slightly painful ache that held a sweet promise of greater pleasure. He couldn't take anymore and he needed Riku inside him, now. One slender leg came up and kicked away Riku's hand, moving back then to hook around Riku's side. He moaned, licking his lips. "In me, **now.**"

Riku wasted no time in scooting up between Sora's thighs, grabbing his cock and positioning himself at that pink stretched opening. With one deep breath, he pushed forward, sinking in slowly as Sora mewled beneath him, grabbing at his shoulders and digging his nails in. The combination of alcohol and Sora's trust in Riku, had him opening up fairly easily, and Riku had to fight to keep from thrusting right away. He had to let Sora fully relax, or he ran the risk of hurting his beautiful little lover, oh how he wished Sora did belong to him.

Sora had never felt anything in his entire life that had him almost crying, yet coming at the same time. It hurt, and there was a pressure in his spine, but under that, was the greatest heat building he'd ever known. He needed more of that, and he knew that if Riku moved, he'd get it. With his legs locking together at the ankles behind the silver-haired boy's back, Sora begged, whimpering and gasping as he shifted his hips for some relief.

"Sora...Stop, just...let me." Riku groaned, bracing his weight on his hands by Sora's head on the mattress.

He slowly withdrew himself, drawing his hips back the smallest fraction, then pushed back in as he started a shallow rhythm.

"Aaaah!" Sora cried, clawing at Riku's back as the older boy began to thrust into him. The whole scene threatened to overwhelm him. The sight of Riku's sweat-slicked body moving above him, the smell of Riku's sweat and musk, and the sharp constant friction on his most sensitive parts. It was almost too much, and he let his eyes slip shut.

Riku was holding onto his control by a thread. If he were by himself, he would have allowed himself to come already, but because he felt the need to make Sora's first time a somewhat enjoyable experience, he stopped his hips, sitting back on his heels and pulling Sora further up his lap. Then he grabbed one of the brunette's legs from under the knee and he pushed that leg up into the air, bending it towards the younger boy's chest. He started to thrust again.

"Aah god… Ooh fuck!" Sora cried, something inside of him throbbing fiercely as Riku continually stroked against it. He didn't know what was happening, but it felt so good, and he braced his arms against the headboard behind him, pushing himself onto Riku as hard as he could. "Oh fu-! Ah, I can't...Oh fuck!" Sora was reduced to babbling, and he wasn't even sure what he was asking for, but he needed Riku faster, deeper, harder.

Sora's pleasured screams at his own actions had Riku's stomach muscles fluttering, his orgasm drawing close. He hadn't had such a quick end with any of the girl's he'd been with before, and he felt like it was his first time all over again. Picking up the speed and slamming even deeper, Riku raced to get Sora to come first. His free hand reached down to palm Sora's neglected erection, fingers wrapping around it, and he fisted it quickly, in time with his thrusts.

"MMmnnnhhhgg, Ooh God!" Sora felt his insides tighten as an incredible heat raced from his ass to his cock, making him shudder and arch back as he came, spurting all over his stomach and Riku's hand, making everything slick and wet.

Riku watched as the boy trembled and moaned, Sora's inner muscles clamping down on his cock and yanking his own release from him. Letting go of the brunette's still twitching length, Riku instead clasped onto his hip, thrusting furiously into his exhausted body as he felt himself come.

Riku shuddered above him and Sora watched at the older boy tensed, then relaxed as he fell onto Sora. He carted shaky fingers through sweaty silver hair, sighing contentedly as he basked in the afterglow of their intense lovemaking.

Breathing deeply, Riku flexed his back, feeling sore points where he was pretty sure Sora had clawed at him, breaking the skin. He raised himself up onto his forearms to check on the younger boy beneath him. Sora looked a little dazed, but otherwise sated, and Riku cupped that adorable face in his hands. "Are you okay?" he asked him quietly.

Sora's sleepy eyes slid shut, but he smiled, his whole body humming happily.

"I love you..." He whispered and then was drifting off into sleep.

…

Two weeks had passed since that night, two weeks Sora spend squeezing his brains out 'til he remember every single detail, every single feeling. But now that he knew what had happened... he wanted it to go away, to never had happen, 'Not like this' he kept repeating to himself. The things he had done and what he had said... he would have never acted that way if he were sober, he was supposed to hate Riku! Not love him like he had said to him!

Sora sighed and buried his head between his arms and over his desk. He had stopped pretending to pay attention long ago. He looked at the clock just above the funny looking biology teacher, 'Just 15 more minutes...'

He hated the way he was feeling, so confused, so annoyed. All he did was go to school and look dully at his teachers while they kept talking and talking, at lunch he just sat alone on his next class or in the bathroom, not eating at all, and then he went home and stayed in his room the rest of the day just staring into nothingness. He couldn't talk to his parents, cause it was too embarrassing, he couldn't talk to Roxas because he couldn't gather the courage, plus Roxas hadn't even noticed there was something wrong, which made Sora think there was something wrong with him and that just made him feel even worse. He couldn't either talk to his friends and _that_ made him feel guilty because they were just worried about him, especially Olette, she was such a nice girl, making her feel worry... it was like a sin... The only person he was talking with was Axel; they talked on the phone at least an hour every day. But Sora hadn't told him what had happened so there was nothing the redhead could do to make him feel better.

So, he wasn't studying, he wasn't talking, he wasn't eating and he looked like he hadn't look at himself in a mirror for years...And all of this because of _him_, because no matter how much he thought about it there was something Sora just didn't understand. Why would Riku go through with it? Was he even drunk? He didn't look drunk... Maybe... maybe he wanted to do it, maybe he felt something for him? No. That's not it. Why would he act like an asshole all the time, why would he act like he couldn't stand Sora when he actually liked him? That was just too stupid, even for Riku.

Sora lifted his head up just to drop it back down with a thud. He knew he could be really naïve sometimes but he also knew he hadn't imagined that night, Riku wasn't drunk, he knew what he was doing!

'Oh who are you kidding? There's just no way he would had agreed to it conscious' he thought bitterly.

The final bell rang and Sora gathered his things up and left looking at his feet to avoid the glare his teacher was giving him for not paying attention. As he walked the halls he made his mind up about what he had to do, it was simple really, he just had to talk to Riku… He gripped at his backpack and pulled it further up his shoulder, 'Easy enough' he thought sarcastically.

The problem now was actually finding the teen. Ever since the party Riku hadn't shown up at his house, not once, which was really weird because being his brother's best friend he used to practically live there, and he wasn't anywhere to be seen in the school either, though they didn't have any classes together Sora usually crossed ways with him in the hallways but not now, it was as if the silver-hair teen had vanished completely.

"You know where he lives Sora, stop being a pussy and deal with this!" he told himself, but as he walked through the high school's entrance all thoughts regarding Riku banished as he spotted a petite girl with brow-reddish hair standing just outside.

"Kairi? What are you doing here?" Sora asked the girl smiling, he had forgotten all about Kairi's role in the events of the night of the party. Kairi flushed "Oh! Uhm hi Sora! I was just… waiting for… someone…" she said looking at something being Sora.

"Really? Who?" Kairi gave Sora an apologetic smile as if she felt sorry for him and said, "Oh Sora, I'm sorry, really…"

'What the fuck is she talking about?' Sora thought starting to loose his patience, nevertheless he smiled and asked "What could you be sorry abo- oh… you."

"Uhm… hi, ho- how are you?" He said looking at somewhere between Sora's chest and belly, making him feel like he was some kind of teletubbie, with a T.V. screen on his stomach and he laughed, though he really felt like crying, "Never better" he said lying shamelessly, "Well, I have better thing to do than just stand here… Bye."

Sora walked slowly away from them trying to remain calm but as soon as Kairi and Riku where out of sight he started running fast and with out destination, blinking the tears away from his eyes.

Falling in tune with the way Sora felt the weather suddenly changed, the sun disappeared and the sky turned grey and it started raining hard and from everywhere but Sora kept running and running and running until his legs hurt and his lungs felt like fire, but he kept running…

...

**read this song!!1 **it fits perfectly with this chapter : D

Let's make love and listen death from above by Cansei de Ser Sexy

You came to show your mad love  
You came to tell it's not enough  
Come and erase me and take me with you  
Kiss me I'm drunk, and don't worry it's true  
I want u to show me how mad is your love  
Come and attack me it's not gonna hurt  
Fight me deny me if I fear when your close  
Let's make love and listen death from above

You knew my ideas when they were in my head  
They were my secret evening plans  
Wine then bed then more then again, wine then bad then more then again  
Run run run, to make your heart shake,  
Kiss kiss kiss will make this earth quake  
I'm gonna get what I'm willin to take  
This gotta worth the miles you made  
Come back I'll warm you up,  
Make me breakfast, I'll make it up  
You're so talented I'm in love  
Let's make love and listen death from above

I'm back with a smack, and I'm ready to attack  
Stare at my lips and I see they were wet  
I know how you're doing by looking at your pants  
And this is how we call it a comeback..

I want to show my mad love,  
You have to know it's not enough  
Come and complete me, stay here with me  
This is all true, it's water I drink  
I want you to show me how mad is your love  
Come and attack me it's not gonna hurt  
Fight me, deny me if I fear when you're close  
Let's make love and listen death from above


	7. Bad Ideas

**i have no idea what to say...**

**this used to be a funny story :) but not now... i almost cried when i wrote this chapter which is incredibly stupid... i have no idea why i'm telling you this... uhm... reviews? please!? i seriously need some critics...**

**Tell Me How**

Chapter Seven

Bad Ideas

"Take notes class for there will be an exam on this topic next week"

There was a faint groan among the students and the sound of pen against paper was heard through the classroom as every student started to take notes. Everyone, except Riku.

The silver hair teen was looking at the window, watching the yellow leafs of a tree outside fall slowly off of it, one by one. He felt that each leaf was like a piece of him because, like that tree, he was slowly breaking apart.

He had never felt so bad in his entire life, he wanted to see Roxas and talk to him but at the same time he couldn't bring himself to look at his best friend in the face. Not after what he had done… What the fuck had he been thinking? Taking advantage of Sora like that... what kind of scum was he?!

He felt like he owed the boy an explanation but, what could he say? There was just no excuse for his actions and he wasn't ready to tell Sora that he was in love with him yet. Riku wondered if the brunette would even believe him if he did… with the childish way he acted around him… he was pretty sure he wouldn't.

Groaning, Riku ran a hand through his silver hair, pulling it hard. Ever since he could remember he had liked Sora, and when they were little, when things were much simpler, he had treated Sora sweetly and taken care of him. But then they grew up and now, he just couldn't help it, whenever he saw Sora... the boy was just too much for him! And the only thing Riku could come up with for not kissing that cute shit to death was making Sora hate him.

'You, my friend are one big asshole' his brain said.

But right now, more than anything else, Riku felt alone. He had been avoiding Roxas and Sora for two weeks now and Namine too because after the first week Riku had gotten tired of hearing his petite blonde friend ask him over and over again what was wrong. And even though Riku was a really popular guy with lots of friends... he only trusted those two blondes so he wasn't just going to talk with anybody and he need to talk with someone, about something, anything to take his mind off... well, his mind.

One big yellowish green leaf detached it self from the tree and fell strangely fast to the grass were it was almost immediately crashed by a foot. This made Riku blink in surprise and smirk, 'I knew this was a bad idea' he thought getting the feeling that leaf was a warning.

The bell rang and Riku hurried through the hallways taking detour after detour so he didn't run into anybody. He had to meet Kairi at the entrance.

'Bad idea, bad idea, bad idea.' His brain kept repeating over and over again.

Kairi had, somehow, gotten his phone number and she had been calling him nonstop for more than a week now. Riku thought she was a sweet girl, creepy and stalkerish but sweet so he had agreed to go out with her today and give it a try, sure he felt bad for letting her think she had a chance with him, but whatever... at this point he was desperate to disconnect himself.

'Bad idea, bad idea, bad idea.'

"I know!" Riku whispered rubbing his temple with his fingers as he entered the main hallway and exit the school.

…

"What could you be sorry abo- oh… you."

"Uhm… hi, ho- how are you?" Riku said looking anywhere but Sora's blue eyes, afraid he might die if he did.

'I told you this was a bad idea...' his brain said, somewhere in his head a mini-Riku was doing an 'I told you so' dance.

"Never better" Sora said laughing, "Well, I have better things to do than just stand here… Bye." And with that he was gone.

"SHIT!" Riku said gritting his teeth.

"Riku? What's wrong sweetie?" Kairi asked him, almost purring.

'What the fuck? Sweetie?!' Riku thought appalled sighing angrily as he turned to look at Kairi for the first time since he had met her and Sora at the door, "Kairi, I can't do this. Sorry." He said and before she could even think about what had been said Riku was running away.

…

"Sora?" Axel ran his long fingers through the longer bangs of Sora's chocolate coloured hair peeking through them to see if he was awake. Sora looked back at Axel with out removing his head from the redhead's lap, his eyes looked sad but his lips were smiling, "You want me to move?" he asked.

Axel, making a great effort to return the sad smile moved his torso a little to get more comfortable in the sofa they were both sitting and pecked Sora's forehead sweetly in the process. Sora gave a faint chuckle acknowledging the kiss and closed his eyes again sighing.

As soon as the boy's sky blue eyes were closed Axel scowled. He was going to kill and/or kick the ass of who ever it was that had made his little friend feel like this.

A few hours ago the brunette had knocked at his door. When Axel saw him through the half opened door he felt his heart breaking at the sight, Sora was soaked from head to toes, his eyes were red and he was panting heavily as if he had just run a marathon. Once the door was fully opened by the redhead teen Sora had slammed himself into Axel's chest and had started crying hugging him for dear life but not wanting to answer any of the questions he threw at him.

At first, Axel had been a little bothered about Sora not wanting to tell him what was wrong but he didn't want to upset the brunette even more, so he didn't troubled him about it, he figured Sora would talk to him when he felt ready.

The tall teen checked his watch when a small "peep" was heard announcing another hour had started… '10:00' it was getting late, 'better take him home' he thought, and once again the raised his finger to call Sora back from the deeps of his mind.

…

If Sora thought he was feeling bad before he didn't know just how the fuck he was feeling now. He felt as if his heart had been left behind in the school yard. Seeing Riku had been bad enough but seeing him with Kairi… let's just say Sora hadn't handle things properly. He had run for what had felt like hours and he had somehow ended up at Axel's place. Luckily for him his older friend had been home and had welcomed him warmly after seeing the shape he was in.

So Sora had spent the rest of the afternoon thinking about what he was going to do to make things 'normal' again, to make the pain go away and he had decided… screw Riku! Well, actually don't screw Riku at all…

He was going to forget all about him. But how? Easiest way to do it was to make Riku hate him; make him never want to see him again because, if he didn't see Riku, he wouldn't want Riku, right?

Somewhere deep inside of him Sora knew he was probably jumping to conclusions but he didn't care. If Riku didn't hurt him now, he eventually would, he always did.

Axel ran a finger across his eyebrow, trying to get his attention again "Want me to take you home?" he asked him in a whisper.

Sora smiled and nodded he was so thankful Axel was there with him, not making questions but just being there. That was all he needed, plus he wasn't ready to talk about things yet, not even with him.

Sora stood up yawning loudly and stretching. No matter how comfortable he had been laying with Axel in the couch, dwelling in the same position all afternoon had left him really stiff.

Axel stood up after Sora rubbing his palms across his thighs to make the feeling in them return and looked at Sora who was looking at the floor biting his lower lip but, as soon as Sora noticed a pair of bright green eyes on him he smiled and looked back at Axel, "I'm sorry for being such a drag." he said.

"Don't worry," Axel responded, heading to the door and holding it open for the brunette, "I'm used to it."

Twenty minutes later Axel and Sora were pulling in front of the younger one's house. The redhead turned the car off and then, the two friends remained still and silence for a few seconds until Axel's stomach hurled with hunger.

"Wanna come inside and grab something to eat?" Sora asked him, laughing quietly.

…

**_SLAM!_**

Riku flinched as his passenger side door car was slammed hard by a very pissed off blonde.

"Where the fuck is he!?" that same blonde boy asked to no-one in particular as he fondle with his house keys and went inside his home when he found the front door unlocked, Riku following close behind.

"Roxas, there's something I need to tell you." He said taking Roxas wrist and turning him around to face him. He had been trying to talk with his best friend all afternoon, but he had failed miserably, not getting any attention at all; but heck, who could blame him, when his younger brother had gone missing…

For a moment, Roxas was about to yell at Riku, but then he looked at is best friend in the eyes and instead of yelling is lungs out, which was exactly what he felt like doing, he took a deep breathe and calmed himself down a little, "Now? Can't it wait? Sora is mi-"

"I know. That's what I want to talk to you about." Riku said hurriedly, not letting the blonde finish his sentence.

Silence…and then laughter, coming from the kitchen. Roxas impossibly blue eyes widen at the sound and he ran across the living room and to the kitchen. Both of them knowing pretty well who that laugh belong to.

…

Sora was laughing loudly. Axel was making a pretty lousy impression of their camp cook, Xaldin and he was wearing a really small and really pink apron with a matching bandana on his red head, no need to say it was freaking hilarious.

Suddenly the kitchen door slid open revealing a very scary looking Roxas, to which Sora smiled fondly, "Rox!"

"Don't yo-! Don't Rox me! Where the fuck were you!? I've been worrying sick about you, looking for you all across town! Do you have any idea wh-" Roxas yelled, ranting about worry, responsibility, being late, cell phones and he even said something about rape and the mafia for a good 10 minutes, pacing back and forth in front of Sora and then, he turned to Axel,

'Uh oh…' the red head thought rightly.

"And you! What were you thinking! I bet this was your entire fault! I bet you convinced him to run off somewhere… that is would be fun or something! Well it's NOT fun! I thought- He could've- You-"

Roxas wasn't making any sense but he kept yelling and poking at Axel's chest with his finger hard enough to make Axel flinch every time it made contact, but he didn't stop him. Though he did try to defend himself, because both Axel and Sora opened their mouths to reply but failed to do so when someone else decided to make an entrance.

"Give him a break Roxas, it's not his fault. It's mine."

No one had time to let Riku's statement sink in because when Riku and Sora's gaze met Sora came down of his seat in the kitchen counter and ran out of the room, pushing Riku out of the way and up the stairs.

"Sora!" Riku yelled, following his dream brunette close behind. Roxas tried to follow them but Axel stopped him by wrapping his arms around his waist, "Let go!" Roxas commanded flushing.

The sound of a door being slammed shut was heard and Axel and Roxas stopped their forcing and stood still for a second trying to hear something more.

Nothing, just silence, everything was still and the blonde could feel a cool minty breath close to his neck and he stiffed, suddenly remembering how close Axel he was.

Axel had only been trying to stop Roxas, wanting the other two teens to talk alone and finally work things out; nothing more than that, just pure innocent intentions. But after the door was closed and they both stayed still Axel couldn't help but notice how good the blond smelled so he leaned a little, just a little to try and catch that smell and memorized it.

"Uhm… Axel?"

Just as fast as he had jumped the blue eyed teen he backed away mumbling an amused "Sorry" as he did.

"Why did you just…-" Roxas started, but he trailed off, he didn't had any idea what was going on and he needed to get some information but there was just so much blood going to his face right now that he couldn't even think properly. There was just something about Axel that made him feel funny and lightheaded.

"I just got the feeling those two had something to talk about" Axel said, noticing how cute Roxas looked when he was confused, making sure to remember every feature of his face.

"What do you mean? And, would you please take that apron off? It makes it really hard to take you seriously." Roxas was starting to get annoyed and Axel laughed and complied, thinking the blonde look even cuter when he was pissed.

The red head didn't really know what to say, he imagined his little friend would want to say something as important as to where his sexual orientation stood himself, and he knew Sora hadn't done such thing yet cause Roxas would have immediately guess what was going on if that were the case. So, he just shrugged and said, "Dunno, really… just a feeling." putting his best innocent smile, after all, he was an actor.

…

Sora went rapidly up the stairs and entered his room, slamming the door shut, knowing Riku was right behind him.

Riku climb the stairs taking two steps at a time an arrived just in time to get the wooden door slammed in his nose but that didn't stop him from re-open the door and stepping inside.

"Sora?"

The brunette was sitting on the foot of his bed looking at his feet; he didn't even blinked when the silver hair teen called his name.

"Sora?" Riku tried again, "We need to talk" he finished taking careful steps toward him.

As he was looking down Riku didn't see Sora when a sad smirk appeared in his lips but he did saw him nod.

"Actually, there is something I've been wanting to tell you." Sora said, standing up and walking boldly toward Riku until they were only a few inches apart.

"Really?" Riku asked a little too confident unable to stop himself, he couldn't help hoping for the best.

Taking a deep breath Sora starting talking, his voice was deep and monotonous, "That night, at Axel's?" he said making a pause to look at Riku, who nodded him to continue eyes wide in surprise, Sora had gone right to the point, hadn't he?

"Look Riku, I was drunk and I don't actually remember a lot about what happened…" Sora was lying shamefully and he couldn't bring himself to look into Riku's eyes, at least not yet,

"…So I don't know if you were drunk too or not, and honestly I don't give a damn." Sora made another pause and forced himself to look into Riku's eyes one again.

He looked confused and angry and Sora saw, with a bit of remorse a hint of sorrow too, but he had gone this far, he couldn't back down now… he knew this was the best thing to do right now, he and Riku could never be together, they were just too different.

"I was drunk, horny and practically naked and you were there so I thought 'why the fuck not?' You know?"

Riku's eyes grew wider for a second but then his whole expression changed and he glared angrily at Sora, "No, I don't."

Sora sighed, faking frustration, "Don't make this personal Riku. If Kairi or even Axel had been there same thing would've happen. Stop acting like a fucking girl."

'Did I actually just say that?' Sora thought surprised at himself, 'Guess I am a good actor after all...'

He was acting so calm and cold when all he wanted to do was curl on the floor and cry like a baby until he couldn't feel anymore.

Riku's hands turn into fists and his knuckles where turning white. His beautiful face contorted in a series of emotions, all of them dark and sad, and every one of them was worse than the other, for a moment Sora thought Riku was going to turn him into pulp right there but then Riku turned his glare to his own feet and scowled looking miserable,

"You said you loved me." He whispered so low Sora barely heard him.

"Love You? Who could ever love you Riku?" he snorted.

The small silence that followed was so thick that Sora thought he could actually hear his own heart breaking and he was just about to stop the nasty facade but he didn't.

'If he didn't punch me before he will now' He thought.

He closed his eyes out of reflex when he saw Riku closing the short distance between them, ready to take the well deserved punch but it never came.

Instead he felt a pair of soft but strong lips press against his own.

'He's kissing me?! After all I said?' Sora thought breaking the kiss to ask Riku just what the heck was he thinking, but as soon as he did the taller teen punched him hard on the jaw.

His knees were still weak from the kiss, and because this time he hadn't been expecting it, the punch made Sora turn on his heels and fall flat on his face. There was a faint cracking sound and blood started to pour down his round small nose; but the brunette didn't complain nor yell, he just lay there, motionless.

"What the FUCK Riku?!"

Unfortunately, Roxas had chosen that very moment to check on them and had just seen his 'best friend' break his little brother's nose.

The blonde entered the room and walked rapidly toward the bloody mess that was Sora not even bothering to look at Riku. Roxas kneeled on the floor next to his brother and placed his head on his thighs holding his nose up.

Sora just looked at him and smiled weakly, hot tears running from his big blue eyes.

"Roxas... I-"

"No!" the blonde yelled, interrupting Riku never taking his eyes of the brunette version of himself, "Get out." He growled.

"Please, just let me ex-"

"GET THE FUCK OUT!" Roxas screamed finally looking at him, he had never looked so angry and betrayed before and Riku was speechless.

"Riku…" Axel, who had been watching the show from the hall outside Sora's room, called him. Riku turned to look at Axel and sighed defeated, following Axel out the room, the house and probably out of both Sora and Roxas life too.


	8. Truths

**OMFGWTFSDFOIGJFVOVFJ finally!! D: !!1**

**i hate this chapter.**

**i'll make it up to you guys, the crappyness i mean, next chapter gonna be the last one (i think) and then the epilogue (which i'm already writing)**

**raise your hands if you want akuroku sex in the epiloge!1**

**Tell Me How**

Chapter Eight

Truths

As soon as Riku stepped down the porch stairs, Axel called his name again and when he looked up the redhead punched him in the jaw, hard enough to make his face turn roughly to the side.

Riku glared at Axel and spat on the floor, his saliva slightly mix with blood for he had bitten his tongue accidentally from the force of the blow; but he didn't do or said anything else. There was no pain worse than the one he was feeling inside and, in some way, the punch had been expected and welcome, anything to shake the numbness he was feeling…

Axel shook his hands and shoulders as if trying to shake the tension off, "Sorry" he said smiling, "But I've been wanting to do that ever since I met you."

The silver hair teen sighed and cleaned the blood of his lips with the back of his hand.

"Can't say I blame you." He said with a hint of a smirk as he started walking slowly to the sidewalk. Axel's smile grew wider and he trotted to Riku's side and starting walking beside him.

They walked in an abnormally comfortable silence for a while, or at least Axel thought of it as comfortable.

Riku on the other hand, was deeply annoyed by the tall teen and his goofy smile. He kept wondering what Axel wanted and he felt like he was being left out of a joke by the way Axel kept looking at him and smirking, so he stopped walking abruptly and glared at him raising a slim silver eyebrow in question, but before he could properly ask Axel spoke, still smiling.

"Coffee?"

'What!?' Riku thought outraged, 'What's with this guy?' he wondered, in fact he was about to ask just that, but instead he heard himself saying, "Sure." though he didn't sound sure at all.

…

"He did _what_?" Axel asked laughing loudly.

"Axel! Geez, calm down." Riku hushed angrily, though he was actually trying not to smile. He couldn't believe how bad he had misjudged Axel… well actually before that night Riku didn't have a bad or good opinion of Axel whatsoever, truth be told, the only thing he had for the punk was a vast amount of jealousy, Axel was just too close to Sora for his opinion.

But in reality Axel was a really fun guy to hang around and he, Riku, though he had tried to avoid it at first was starting to really like him. They had lots of things in common and somehow he could now see them both becoming friends.

Two hours had past since they had left Sora's home and gone to the nearest coffee-shop. Two hours they had spend talking (mostly, it had been Riku telling Axel all about what had happened between him and Sora, and I mean_ everything _from when they were little to when Riku had started liking the brunette and finally what had happened at the redhead's party and what Sora had told him that day).

Axel had listened in complete silence and with a strait, emotionless face but as soon as Riku had finished the tale he had, much to the silver-hair teen's surprise and annoyance, burst out laughing.

Fortunately for him, Axel had explained himself right after, cause if he hadn't…

'He would be dead by now' Riku thought smirking as he watched the other trying to muffle his laughter with his hand.

What Axel had told Riku was that both him and Sora were complete idiots and that he found it incredibly amusing how things (that should had been simple and 'happy-ever-afterly') had gotten so complicated and screwed up just because of their prides and prejudices.

Riku didn't understand why Sora was an idiot too. Of course he understood why he was one; he knew he should have told Sora the truth from the beginning, that he should have never treated Sora badly, that he should have left the room that night, that he should have never even started thinking about Sora_ that_ way in the first place. As far he knew this was his entire fault, so he didn't understand why this was, according to Axel, a two way deal.

And he hadn't got a chance to ask because Axel had started asking question after question about the night of the party with out even letting Riku breathe until all his fully detailed questions were answered, _with fully detailed stories_.

That was the reason why he was laughing now, apparently the fact that Sora had been so _insistent _about spending the night with Riku and so _bold_ about their activities that righteous night was hilarious to the redhead. Or maybe he was just exaggerating.

Riku had noticed that Axel did a lot of silly expressions and comments just to make him forget, if even for a second, about his current situation, making him feel somewhat better, and Riku appreciated it deeply.

…

Deep blue eyes glared unforgivingly into a matching pair as Sora stared at his reflection in the bathroom's mirror while Roxas prepared a bath for him.

'Okay, so maybe making Riku hate me was not such a good idea' the brunette thought stupidly.

"Oh well, at least it worked…" he then snorted bitterly, but not loud enough for his brother to hear him.

He was so mad at himself he would have probably broke that damn mirror with his head if Roxas hadn't been in the same room looking at him every few seconds. He had never intended for Roxas and Riku to fight, frankly it was the last thing he wanted…Roxas shouldn't suffer because of him and his stupidity! He didn't deserve it.

'Fuck!' Sora thought impotently, gripping the white marble of the sink painfully until his knuckles turned white as he watched his big brother hung clean towels for him to use,

'And watching him take care of me like this, when it's all my fault. Why does he have to be so perfect?!' he asked dumbly, his brother's actions just making him feel worst.

"Sora," Roxas called, interrupting Sora's doomful thoughts, "the tub is ready." He said taking two long steps toward the door to give his brother some privacy. His actions, ever since Riku had left, were short, quick and rough and his body was stiff, Roxas was still terribly upset about his best friend.

Sora bit his lip in a moment of hesitation and then he moved to block his big brother's path and hugged him strongly making all the stiffness in the blonde's body melt away.

"Thanks Rox," Sora said sweetly and then, as a second thought he added "I'm sorry."

"…Sora what happened?"

"…"

At the lack of an answer, Roxas sighed loudly and pulled away, "Just take the damn bath and relax a little… we'll talk later" he said.

Sora wasn't ready to explain, fine, he could handle that, Roxas thought, but after the bath his little brother was not going to survive the evening without explaining himself to him.

The brunette sat on the tub filled with warm water as soon as his brother was out of the room… his head was starting to hurt for thinking too much…

He had never seen Roxas so mad at Riku before, their friendship had been jeopardized just because he'd been jealous of Riku going out with Kairi… or…Kairi going out with Riku? Anyway… the important thing was that it was his fault, everything was his fault,

'_If I hadn't said those things…'_

-But you were upset, he went out with Kairi!-

_'Whatever I still shouldn't have slept with him… If I hadn't kissed him'_

-But you were drunk-

_'Well, yeah but nobody obliged me to get drunk I did that too… If I hadn't gotten drunk…'_

-You got drunk because Kairi was flirting with Riku-

_'So what? You are not going to blame Kairi for this! I know it makes everything easier for us but it's not the right thing to do! We've screwed up for the last time! We…? Who the fuck am I talking to?_

_Oh shit. I've gone mad… No matter. I still need to fix things! First I have to tell Rox everything; he has to know it's my fault and not Riku's.'_

It had been really stupid of him not to tell the truth to his brother from the beginning but the damage was already done and all that was left to do now was mend things; he had to come clean.

_'But how do I say this?'_

When Sora walked in his room after the long hot bath he found Roxas waiting for him sitting comfortably in his bed.

The blonde waited patiently for his brother to explain. He watched amused as Sora sat himself backwards on his desk-chair in front of him and looked up, then down and sideways, opened his mouth and close it again making him look like a fish and then repeated the process all over.

"It's really curious, don't you think?" Sora asked suddenly.

"What?"

"That we are both gays" He responded while kicking his legs around like a child.

"I'm not gay!" Exasperated, Roxas stood up, "Wait. WHAT!?"

Amused by his reaction, Sora gave his brother a lopsided smile but then he sighed deeply, "You better sit down again this is going to take a while…"

…

"…and that's it." Sora said, taking a seat next to Roxas.

He had just finished his catching up with the blonde and somewhere along the story he had stood up and started pacing throw the room and now he felt dizzy.

"That's it. That's it?!" Roxas was feeling a little dizzy himself, still he stood up, it was his turn to pace around.

In another place, any other time and it would have been hilarious, Sora thought, seeing his always collected big brother look at him, glare, look at the floor, try to talk, maybe yell, then look at the floor again and back at him but with tender eyes and then glare some more all the while walking around the room like a caged beast.

"Jeez Sora!" he finally said.

'All that jazz just for that?' Sora thought, but he didn't know Roxas wasn't done talking.

"You have to talk to him now!-"

'Huh?'

"-No wait! I have to talk to him first! Oh! I'm such an asshole! I can't believe I didn't notice! And he tried to explain but I didn't let him…"

'I repeat, huh!?'

"…_Poor thing_ he must feel so bad-"

"Okay okay now… What the fuck are you talking about?!"

Saying Sora was confused now would be an understatement, why was Roxas talking about Riku like he was some damsel in distress or some fuck like that, he didn't know. 'Maybe I broke him,' he thought 'too much information at once, maybe he's gone mad.'

Roxas stopped his pacing to look at the brunette and blinked, "Right. Sorry, I forgot how stupid you can be." He muttered.

"Gee thanks."

Roxas was having a hard time trying not to knock his little brother out, "Riku likes you Sora! He always has! Don't you get it?" he said grabbing him by the shoulders and shaking him a little for good measure.

Sora's mouth was open and his eyes were wide and blank, he looked really stupid and Roxas couldn't help but laugh out loud.

Roxas laughter woke Sora out off his short daze but it was too late for his brother was already leaving the room.

"Wait! Wha- Why- Aren't you gonna explain?!"

"Of course not!" Roxas said with out looking back.

"Bu- Why?"

With a hand already in the handle Roxas turned to look at a puppy faced Sora, he smirked.

"You got yourself into this mess alone; it's only fair if you work it out alone too." Sora looked like he was about to argue but Roxas continued, "Take it as punishment for not telling me all of this shit earlier"

"Touché."

With a smile Roxas left and closed the door but a second later his head was poking back in, "Hey Sora… How come you said we were both gays?"

Sora blinked and laughed nervously scratching the back of his head, "Oh that! I was just joking, just joking." He said waving his free hand in the air.

The blonde just raised a fair eyebrow. The simple action clearly said "Don't lie to me little brother."

-sigh- "I was thinking… maybe you had a thing for Axel." Sora mumbled not meeting his eyes.

Roxas was taken aback, "Why?"

The brunette raised his head to look at him and shrugged, "Because of the way you look at him." He said matter-of-factly, then he watched as his brother just blinked, shook his head and left.

'Did I say something wrong?' he thought clueless.

…

_BIIP BIIP BIIP_

**_CRASH!_**

Riku got up from his bed and looked blindly for his alarm clock before remembering he had just crushed the annoying thing against the wall. Sighing and stretching exaggeratedly he looked for his cellphone instead.

It was 10 : 52 in the morning.

'I hit the snooze button too much.' He thought not really caring and started fumbling with his phone to see if he had any messages or lost calls… he did, as a matter of fact he had 10 lost calls.

And they were all from Kairi. He ignored them and shoved the phone away as he was making his way to the shower.

Ten minutes later Riku was sitting in his living room couch some loose jeans and a white shirt on, looking at his phone as if he was trying to make the small device confess a crime. Taking a deep breath he started dialing a phone he knew by heart and looked at it for a really long time, his thumb moving to the send button to the end button and back, but then he shook his head and shut his phone.

The silver-hair teen looked around the room and back at his phone and he stood up, walked to the kitchen and went straight to the fridge, he opened the door and peeked inside not really looking. Again, Riku sighed in annoyance but this time it was more like a groan than a sigh. He slammed the fridge door close and ran to where his cell was, dialed the number again and pressed the send button rather harshly. He waited for a few seconds to hear the tone... but what he heard was "I'd die for you" by Megan Mcauley's ringtone just outside his door.

Riku's brow creased and he walked slowly to the door and opened it. And he smiled.

"Hi." Roxas said with an unsure smile.

"You gonna get that?" Riku asked him leaning his head on the door frame and nodding towards Roxas phone, which he held forgotten in his hand. Roxas shrink one of his blue eyes and smirked, he picked up the phone and ask "You gonna let me in?" into the speaker before shutting the phone and stuffing it back into his pocket.

Riku moved hastily to let Roxas in and they sat on the living room phasing each other.

"I'm sorry." Riku said hurriedly before Roxas could even blink.

"Why yes, you should be sorry." Roxas answered coldly making Riku flinch, "You should be sorry you thought it was okay not to let your best friend know you were in love with his younger brother!"

"How did you…-"

"Sora told me everything," Roxas said and then he laughed at the panicked expression that crossed Riku's face, "Even though he made you look like the bad guy –smirk- I Know you Riku… I know I say that a lot but it's true and I know you love him, right?"

Riku just blinked. So Roxas continued, "I mean, it makes sense!" he said standing up from his chair, "It explains a lot of things and well, it's either that or you're a… bitch!" Roxas finished looking at Riku with pleading eyes as if saying 'please don't be a bitch' and he couldn't help but laugh loudly, his laugh being accompanied by Roxas laugh right after.

There was a reason why they were best friends and this was it. There was just nothing they couldn't work out when they talked and the fact that they were both smart and knew each other so well had a lot to do with it. They had always helped each other and they were always honest with each other even if I meant being hard 'cause they knew the other could take it. There was just nothing that could ever upset them for too long, they needed each other because they both had no-one else to confide to (there are some thing you can only tell a close friend), no-one else they trusted that much.

Roxas spent the whole day in Riku's place talking about the events of the last weeks and remembering things about their past, things that had seemed weird for Roxas then but now made perfect sense. Even though they had always helped each other out before and even though Riku had practically begged his friend, Roxas had only told Riku to talk to Sora and tell him the truth cause, Roxas was still mad about the fact no-one had bothered to talk to him about thing before everything came crumbling down.

**...**

**the choise of song for Roxas ringtone it's dedicated to Tysonkaiexperiment (thanks for all the love hun!) she told me this song would fit nicely with the last chapter;**

**lyrics:**

Your fear it moves me.

Your weakness I taste.

I breathe you, I hate you.

You course through my veins.

And now.

And now.

You want me. You love me.

And I hate myself.

I need you, but I hate you.

'Cause I want nothing else.

And I bleed you since I've healed you.

Your pain escapes through me.

'Cause I breathe you, but I hate you.

'Cause they say we could never be.

They can't see.

I know I shouldn't love you.

There's just too much to fake.

But you see me, and I feel you.

And I am not afraid.

I'm not afraid.

And I bleed you since I've healed you.

Your pain escapes through me.

'Cause I breathe you, but I hate you.

'Cause they say we could never be.

It seems the pain's been traded,

Since I pulled you through.

And now my mind's been so jaded.

And I would kill myself for you.

I'd die for you.

And I bleed you since I've healed you.

Your pain escapes through me.

'Cause I breathe you, but I hate you.

'Cause they say we could never.

And I bleed you since I've healed you.

But I hate you, but I breathe you.

And I feel you.

And I see you.

And I hate you.

But I'd die for you.

I'd die for you.


	9. Tell Me How

**Tell Me How**

Chapter Nine

Tell Me How

"Sora! Sora wake up!!"

_"Mmngh…_ five more minutes..."

Roxas rolled his eyes and pulled the sheets off of Sora, "C'mon Sora... we are gonna be late for school!"

"Fuck school…" Sora grunted, burrowing his head into the pillow.

Roxas laughed, he never did get tired of Sora not being a morning person, and "Riku told me he wanted to talk to you…" he said singsonging.

At this, Sora jumped out of bed, "Really?!" he asked, a glint of hope very visible in his blue eyes.

Roxas looked at his brother and regretted having just told a lie, he knew the "little white lie" would get him out of bed, what he didn't know was that it would break his heart, seeing his brother so happy about hearing from his best friend…

"No, not really," he said looking guilty, "but you'll see him at school! If you wanna talk to him… just do it!"

Sora sighed and nodded unsurely, "I doubt he'll even want to look at me at all…"

There was a heavy silence that followed Sora statement, Roxas wanting to say something but didn't know what.

"Well… I should get ready," Sora said with a fake smile, "We don't wanna be late."

Roxas smiled back, a real, assuring smile; one that clearly said 'the sun will come out tomorrow' or some shit like that; it was one of his best smiles and it made Sora feel better, made his fake smile change into a real one, small, but real.

…

School went by pretty slowly, teachers would only talk about what they were going to be studying that semester and blabbering about how hard quizzes were going to be and every other sort of useless things teachers usually talk about when they don't feel like doing their job.

Even though Sora didn't really want to confront Riku he had hoped he would at least see him around lunch and recess but there was no sight of the handsome teen.

At least he had had a chance to see all his friends again and they always manage to make him laugh, he had missed them a lot these days and they were the best distraction he could think off. He had also called Axel on his free time to talk about nothing, Axel was very good at talking about nothing, that was one of the things he liked best of his red-head friend, but even so, Riku was still hanging at the back of his mind… he wanted to apologize for being so heartless, he still thought that they could never be but he still wanted them to be the way they used to; no matter how much it hurt and how much he hated the way Riku used to treat him, he wanted to do it for his brother's sake.

But, how could he ask for forgiveness after what he had said? He didn't have any idea what to say, he figured, he would find the words when he saw him. Problem was, he hadn't…

School day was almost over when he saw silver hair on the hallway, Riku had just entered the men's room and Sora had run and zigzagged through the students after him. He opened the door and leaned against it panting slightly.

"Sora?"

Riku, who had been washing his hands then, was looking at him surprised. When Sora looked up and saw him standing there… waiting for him to say something, he panicked. He made a strange and faint squeak sound and ran out and into the hall that was suddenly empty.

'Were the fuck did everybody run off too?!' Sora thought alarmed, looking for a place to hide.

"Sora! Wait!"

Riku had followed him out, there was no chance he could hide now, was there? Oh! But how he wished he could be just swallowed by the ground right then. Slowly as if it pained him to do so he turned around to face Riku one more time.

"Uhm, hi." he said shyly.

"I've been looking everywhere for you."

Surprised, Sora gaped at him "You were?"

"Yeah, you see I wanted to ask you something." Riku said taking one step closer, looking really serious.

"Look Riku, I'm so-" Sora began apologizing but Riku cut him middle speech…

"You told me you loved me, remember?"

…and left him open mouthed.

"And then you said you didn't love me, in fact you said no-one would ever love, but nevermind that." Riku said rapidly, he looked nervous all of the sudden.

The tall teen took a deep breath and moved even closer to Sora bending his neck slightly so that he could look at him in the eyes.

"What I want to know Sora is: how did you do it; how did you stop?"

The petit brunette was extremely nervous, his palms where sweating, his heart felt like it was going to explode and he had no idea what was Riku talking about.

"I…-what?"

"Tell me…" Riku said in almost a whisper, "Tell me how did you stop loving me so easily, so fast."

'Okay… What the fuck is going on here!?' Sora thought awfully confused, 'When did I stopped!?'

"I-… I…" he had no idea what to say! To him, Riku was talking nonsense, this was too weird! And being this close to Riku made his heart ache, he was loosing it.

And apparently, Riku was loosing it too because one second he was only inches apart and the next he was grabbing Sora's shoulders harshly and glaring at him, "Tell me how to stop loving you!" he said in a harsh deep voice.

To Sora the whole world stopped right then and there, everything felt heavier, especially air, he couldn't breathe, he couldn't think and he couldn't talk. Riku loved him? But he didn't want to anymore, well that was obviously his fault, no point longing on that. But, Riku_ loved_ him? _Him_?

Why? Where? When? And what could he do now? What should he say?

"I…" Fuck! Is that the only word he could say?!

Riku looked like he was about to cry, his beautiful eyes were shining wet and he tilted his head down letting silver hair fall to the side of his face.

"Please Sora, I can't do this anymore, you need to break the spell you charmed me with. Please, tell me how."

"I- I can't." Sora said tacking is eyes off Riku and glaring at the floor.

Riku looked up, surprised at Sora's tone of voice, it sounded stranded as if he was crying and sure enough, when Riku crocked his head to look at Sora's face tears were falling silently from his deep blue eyes, staining his pink cheeks.

"Why?" He whispered.

"Because I never stopped, okay!? I never stopped loving you." Sora nearly yelled, still glaring at the floor, then slowly he moved his eyes, his face still facing away and he whispered shyly, "I love you."

The grip on his hands lesser and Sora realised Riku had been keeping him on his tip toes cause his feet touched ground just then, slowly he turned his head to look properly at Riku, wanting to see the reaction to his 'little confession'.

Riku was just standing there, eyes wide, mouth slightly open.

He knew it was wrong to think about it, but he could help but notice how luscious his lips looked right then. The sight made him lick his own lips involuntarily, however, it seemed his innocent action brought Riku back to the living, because right then Riku blinked and looked keenly at Sora's lips and slowly, very slowly be started to lean closer, Sora tilted his head to the side and leaned, just as slowly, toward Riku.

**_RIIIIIIING!_**

The fire alarm rung right then and both Riku and Sora stood straight and backed away a big step as quickly as possible; Sora was flushing furiously and Riku looked slightly irritated, he even took a moment to glare at the stupid bell.

Some god-damned asshole had thought it funny to interrupt school. Students and teachers starting filling the halls, some looked happy, others scared and some looked like they had been waken up by the bell. The principal was mad and screaming at the top of his lungs it had been a false alarm but no-one was listening, and soon all the staff and the students were outside enjoying the sun.

Sora and Riku had been separated by the crowd, not before they gave each other a nervous smile, and now Sora was sitting on the grass, with his back against an old tree, waiting for Roxas who he had text messaged with his location.

Minutes later Roxas came and positioned him self Indian style in front of Sora, his back against the school's wall.

"What took you so long?" Sora asked him irritated; he had been waiting anxiously to tell his brother about all about what had happened with Riku for a while now, he had learned his lesson, no more secrets for Roxas.

Roxas smiled creepily at him, "I was talking with Riku." he said.

Sora didn't have even time to blush before Riku came toward them dragging by red hairs a tall teen.

"Axel!? What are you doing here?" Sora asked standing up surprised.

"Ow! Sur- Ow! -prise!" Axel responded awkwardly, Riku still tugging at his hair.

Sora looked at Riku and raised his eyebrow in question to which Riku responded with, "Guess who activated the alarm."

Opening his mouth in bewilderment Sora looked back at Axel and the redhead smiled apologetically at him, "Sorry! Ow! Would you fucking let go now!? Thanks!" be said when Riku let him go to sit next to Roxas, not before he gave Axel a not too hard kick on the ass.

Sora giggled cutely looking at Axel rub his sore butt before dragging him down to sit next to him by the tree.

"What are you doing here?" he asked him trying to ignore Riku, who was looking at him with a smirk on his face.

"I thought I'd come here and treat you some ice-cream, but for some reason, I've got the feeling I came at the wrong time." He said glaring at Riku at the last part.

Riku just laughed and winked at Sora who passed from sun-kissed to tomato skin in a nanosecond.

"Roxas is free and he loves ice-cream, right Rox?" The silver-hair teen said elbowing the blond indiscreetly on the ribs.

It was Roxas time to blush now, but he only did for a second before he looked at Sora and then at Riku -who raised his eyebrows at him and nodded to the street- and then he smiled wickedly at Axel.

Did they really think he was not getting what was going on?! Had the world gone mad and he was suddenly a blushing bride who needed help to be left alone with the boy he wanted?! He was going to kill Riku when Roxas and Axel were gone, who did he think he was, winking and smiling at him like that, and making him blush?! Sora scowled, feeling a little too embarrassed.

Axel and Roxas had left while Sora was lost in his thoughts, and now Riku was looking at him shyly, all the confidence of just seconds ago flushed down the toilet.

And even though Sora thought it cute –and annoying- to know Riku used his fake confidence and jokes too hide his true feelings, he was still mad at him for making him look so… so… so uke!

In the blink of an eye, Sora raised himself and jumped back down over Riku's legs, straddling him and punching him open handed in the arms and chest.

"Ouch, what –ahahah- wha- are you owahaha doing!?" The silver hair teen asked laughing.

"What the hell was that?!" Sora said still hitting him.

"Ahhahaooow, wha- what are you ow! Talking ahaha about!?"

"You! Making fun of me again! Making me blush! You haven't change a bit!! I thought you lo-" But Sora never got to finish that sentence because Riku chose that rightful moment to grab the boy's head and kiss him passionately.

There, sitting on Riku's waist while the tall teen leaned his back on the school's wall, both of them hidden by the old big tree, while Riku kissed him, Sora froze, eyes wide for just a second before shutting them and melting into the kiss, kissing back just as passionately.

And they were both sober!

They stayed like that, exploring each others mouths, pouring out all the love they felt for one another, all the words they never said to each other, but then Sora moaned and Riku pulled back, suddenly remembering they were in a public place.

He looked dearly into Sora's eyes, both off them were panting rather heavily and the brunet was blushing again, he had never looked so beautiful before, Riku thought, his eyes heavy and darker with lust and his lips pink and bruised from the kiss. He couldn't wait to take him home.

Riku raised his hand and cuddled the other's hot cheek with it.

Sora closed his eyes and leaned into the touch and Riku smiled.

"I love you so much."

The End.

...

**D : it's done.**

**just the epilogue left...**

**reviews?? please? it's really important!**


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